Jadeveon Clowney is no longer a good football player

Like Jadeveon Clowney in college, I was like, that guy's not going to be good at the next level because he wears number two. I was right. He's not good anymore.

Kliff Kingsbury is a 'mimbo' who doesn't understand late-game clock management

It was more of a, I think we're right that Kliff Kingsbury's kind of a mimbo. I don't really understand what Kliff Kingsbury was doing at the end of the game. I don't know why they were throwing to the end zone three times in a row when all they needed was to just keep moving.

Anyone who tries to fight DK Metcalf should be suspended for their own safety

If you try to fight DK Metcalf, you should be suspended just for your own health. Because you need to get your brain examined at that point. [Metcalf] is a scary big dude who's very, very muscular.

Garrett Bolles should catch a pass before he retires

I want to be able to bet on Garrett Bolles to have one reception in every game. Because I feel like Sean Payton is going to try to get him that touch. He definitely will because he doesn't want him to retire as the guy who never touched the ball.

The Eagles' offense might be better without A.J. Brown

I actually think that the offense might be better without A.J. Brown.

The Chargers should eliminate their kicking game and go for it every time

The Chargers should just not have a punter. They should not have a kicker. They shouldn't even have like a long snapper on the team. Use those positions on somebody else and you're just—burn the boats. You're just going for it all the time. Fuck it. Who cares? Right? Season's over. Might as well try to score some points.