Skip to content
PMTPMT DB
Void
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Secretariat's records are fraudulent and he likely used steroids

Secretariat had 663 children... Guess how many of his kids won a Triple Crown race? The answer is zero... every mile time has gradually gotten better over the years except horse racing... He also lost a bunch of races... they had an excuse ready after every single loss... he had horse herpes and they blamed his loss on that... The more you look into Secretariat, the more it stinks to high heaven.

This is a satirical historical re-evaluation that cannot be definitively proven or disproven regarding the steroids, though his breeding stats are a matter of record.

Featured in

More from this episode

View episode
Loss
May 13, 2024
#15239
HankHank

The Nuggets are the scariest team left in the playoffs

The Nuggets are the scariest team in the West. You're right. Left in the playoffs period. Like the Nuggets just do not care. Like they're not worried ...

The Nuggets lost in the second round to the Timberwolves. The Celtics won the championship.
Loss
May 13, 2024
#28310
HankHank

The Western Conference power ranking right now is the Nuggets, followed by the Timberwolves, the Thunder, and then the Mavericks

[PFT Commenter: Rank the four teams outta the west. Scary. Who are you the most scared of?] Nuggets one, Timberwolves, Thunder... [Mavs are 4].

The Mavericks, whom Hank ranked last, actually won the Western Conference.
Void
May 13, 2024
#28311
Big CatBig Cat

I am out on the Thunder for using the 'Hack-a-Lively' strategy with six minutes left in a close playoff game

I might be out on the Thunder... I thought that was so fucking lame that they did Hack-a-Lively with six minutes left. It was a five point game... You're the one seed and you're down five in the fourth quarter with six minutes left... and you're doing fucking Hack-a-Lively. Come on man.

This is a subjective opinion on team identity and strategy.

More from PFT Commenter

View profile
Win
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Detroit Pistons are moving in the right direction despite their Game 7 loss

The progression of the Pistons along the way is like, what were they, two years ago? They won like 16 or 18 games. They were so bad. Last year they had competitive series against The Knicks. Then this year, the natural progression from that is, let's take the regular season super seriously. Let's win all the games that we can get a high seed... I would say the totality of this season, we're still going the right direction in Detroit.

The Pistons did indeed improve from 14 wins in 2023-24 to a high seed in 2026, making the trajectory claim historically accurate within the show's timeline.
Open
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

I will renounce my American citizenship and become French if the Canadiens win the Stanley Cup

I will renounce American citizenship and become French if the Canadiens win the Stanley Cup this year... I'll probably need somebody to come and hang out with me and... the south of France is nice.

The 2026 Stanley Cup winner is pending. If Montreal wins, we await PFT's French naturalization.
Void
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Patrick Reed is the first PAWG in the history of professional golf.

Patrick Reed, let me tell you, I think he might be the first PAWG golfer. He is. He's thick as hell. Like he was filling out. He also wears... the tight pants... he looks like early era Meghan Trainor... He bends over. He's like, ooh.