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Loss
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The 2017 NBA Finals will be the Wizards vs. the Warriors, with the Wizards winning in six games

I got the Wizards because John Wall and Kevin Durant are going to be tough to defend. So I got the Wizards going up again. I'm going to say the Warriors make it back again. Wizards, Warriors, Wizards in six.

KD signed with the Warriors. The 2017 Finals were Warriors vs. Cavs. The Wizards did not make the Finals.

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Win
May 13, 2016
#24260
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Warriors-Thunder series will feature Russell Westbrook and Steph Curry flexing on each other and it will be awesome

This is going to be Westbrook flexing on Steph Curry, Steph Curry trying to flex on Westbrook. It's going to be awesome.

The 2016 Western Conference Finals went to 7 games and was an all-time classic, though the Warriors eventually won.
Loss
May 13, 2016
#9886
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Tim Duncan will likely forget to retire and just keep showing up to the gym through inertia

There's a chance that Tim Duncan just forgets to retire and just by like... through inertia, he keeps showing up at the gym. I think that's more likely than him actually retiring.

Tim Duncan did officially retire on July 11, 2016, a few months after this episode.
Win
May 13, 2016
#24261
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Steven Adams is a genuine mustache guy, not like the ironic losers who just talk about them

Adams is like a genuine mustache guy. And like half of his tweets are about how much he loves mustaches. Um, so I'm looking forward to seeing him and [Andrew] Bogut going at each other.

Steven Adams has maintained one of the most iconic mustaches in the NBA for his entire career.

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Open
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Garrett Bolles should catch a pass before he retires

I want to be able to bet on Garrett Bolles to have one reception in every game. Because I feel like Sean Payton is going to try to get him that touch. He definitely will because he doesn't want him to retire as the guy who never touched the ball.

It requires Garrett Bolles to record a touch before the end of his career; that has not been resolved here.
Open
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Eagles' offense might be better without A.J. Brown

I actually think that the offense might be better without A.J. Brown.

Whether Philadelphia's offense performs better without A.J. Brown is a season-level comparative claim and is not reliably resolved here.
Void
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Chargers should eliminate their kicking game and go for it every time

The Chargers should just not have a punter. They should not have a kicker. They shouldn't even have like a long snapper on the team. Use those positions on somebody else and you're just—burn the boats. You're just going for it all the time. Fuck it. Who cares? Right? Season's over. Might as well try to score some points.

This is a deliberately satirical roster-building proposal, not a prediction that can be objectively graded.