Big Ben Roethlisberger will spend the entire offseason watching pornography

Sad Big Ben. He's going to watch so much porn this offseason.

Beating the Steelers was effectively the Super Bowl for the Cleveland Browns

These Browns just won the Super Bowl because I don't think anybody expects the Browns to go out next week and beat the Chiefs... this was the Super Bowl for the Browns, and they did it.

The Steelers will trade for Sam Darnold and he will become the next Ben Roethlisberger

I still think they're going to get Sam Darnold, and he's going to be the new Big Ben. He's kind of fit for it. Big guy, throws some picks.

The Rams' Australia travel plan was an all-time 'fuck it' move

It was a terrible idea that Sean McVay tried to do, but I have to respect how much of an all-time fuck-it move it was to just pretend that time zones don't exist. He was just like, you know what, fuck it, we're not gonna adapt. We're gonna fly in, fly out.

KOC will get the best out of Kyler Murray

I think that what he's gonna get the absolute best outta Kyler Murray that he possibly can at this point, which I think should be good enough to be a pretty good team this year.

Jayden Daniels is going to remind everyone that the bad man is back

I think Jayden Daniels, he's as healthy as he has been since the start of last season. ... I think that he's gonna remind a lot of people who he is. Yeah. That's what I think. I think the bad man might be back.