The Cleveland Browns are smarter to do nothing in free agency than to fail spectacularly again

I think the Browns are just playing the game where they fucked up so bad in the past and everything that they've done that not doing anything is actually a smarter move than trying to do something and failing because you can't stay still. You're going to piss off your fans for about six months if you don't do anything in free agency. But a fan's not going to remember that like a year from now.

The NFL Draft is essentially just kidnapping players for the benefit of the Cleveland Browns

The only reason [the Browns] can get players to play on their team is by essentially tricking them to join the team via the draft. That's pretty much – the draft is kidnapping players, if we're going to be honest with themselves.

Brock Osweiler is the perfect fit to continue the Texans' lineage of awful quarterbacks

Brock Osweiler to the Texans, there has never been a better fit in the entire world. And I'm not talking about fit like, oh, the Texans need a quarterback... I'm talking about Brock Osweiler is the perfect guy to continue the Houston Texans mantle of awful quarterbacks. David Carr, Sage Rosenfels, T.J. Yates, Matt Schaub, Brandon Weeden, Ryan Mallett, Ryan Fitzpatrick, Brian Hoyer.

The Rays are playing an exciting brand of baseball

It's a very, very exciting brand of baseball. And I'm gonna miss it when it's over. So I did not wanna sweep, so thank you.

The Cowboys are a bad football team

The Cowboys are a bad football team. And I can't wait for people to start to say like, this is when, look at the schedule. Dallas is gonna put some wins together.

Performance-enhancing drug shortages may explain dominant teams falling off

There started to be severe, severe supply chain issues when it came to performance enhancing drugs and peptide shipments coming to the United States. I just think it's interesting.