NFL ratings will skyrocket now that the election is over

All those people who are watching electric coverage instead of the NFL, welcome back. The league is better than ever. Ratings are going to skyrocket.

A unified hatred of being a Browns fan is the only thing that can pull the nation together

The most healing thing might be to sit down and all watch the Browns because we're all experiencing relief that at least we're not Browns fans. That is the one thing that can pull our nation together, our unified hatred of potentially being a Browns fan.

LeBron James is due to get busted for steroids at any time

And LeBron's due to get busted for steroids any time now.

England will beat the Netherlands and then lose a heartbreaking match to Argentina

I think England's gonna win this weekend. And then you'll have the realization that it might not actually be coming home after all... losing to Argentina at that stage, that would be the most heartbreaking loss they could possibly have.

Christian Pulisic is clearly not and cannot be the face of US soccer

I'm just sick of relying on him [Pulisic] to be the face of US soccer because it can't be, it's so clear that he's not.

The 4-1 loss to Belgium was the worst USMNT performance in years

That was the worst performance from the US that I've seen in years. Just completely lackluster from the start. So much blame to go around. Tim Ream, friend of the program, good guy over the hill, turned into soccer Shawn Bradley before our very eyes got dunked on twice.