The Vikings can beat any team in the NFC

The Vikings definitely need to be taken for real in terms of the NFC. Like they are a team that could beat anyone in my mind. I don't think there's one team in the NFC where you're like, man, that team [is untouchable] besides maybe the 49ers.

The Eagles will win the NFC East because the Cowboys only beat up on the 'Sisters of the Poor'

I think that Dak Prescott is a franchise quarterback, but them as a full team, not that good. And the teams they've beaten have been bad, and they beat up on the Sisters of the Poor... I think the Eagles will win that division because they're now tied 5-4, and the remaining game is in Philadelphia.

The Ravens' win over the 0-8 Bengals was more impressive than their wins against the Patriots and Seahawks

This win by the Ravens today was more impressive than their wins against the Patriots and the Seahawks because this was a classic letdown spot, a classic spot where the Ravens were going to read their press clippings... No. They demolished them from the first play on.

I will never learn my lesson and will continue to believe in the Houston Cougars for the next four years

If you think this is going to deter me from believing in the Houston Cougars for the next four years, you are sadly mistaken. I will never learn my lesson when it comes to this team.

I'm glad I missed Peyton Manning's birthday because he has enough people sucking his dick

I'm glad I missed Peyton Manning's birthday by the way. Fuck, fuck that guy. He's got enough people to suck his dick and wish him a happy birthday. Awful announcing quote that. I hope I do it again next year.

Nate Oats would not be a great fit at UNC

I don't think he'd be a great fit there. Would people be talking about Nate Oats as much for this job if he didn't wear those jackets? They feel like Carolina jackets. It feels like he's been accepting people into anticipating him being the next UNC coach for a while.