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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Los Angeles Clippers will not do anything in the 2021 NBA playoffs

I don't really expect the Clippers to do jack shit in the playoffs again this year, but it'll be nice to see [Rondo] out there.

The Clippers actually reached the Western Conference Finals for the first time in franchise history in 2021, though they lost to the Suns.

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Void
Mar 26, 2021
#22045
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Drake is a corny person but his songs are awesome

I'm reserving the right to still think that Drake is corny. [But] his songs are awesome. I think he might have some talent in it. His songs go, as the kids say. He's growing as an artist.

Whether Drake is corny is inherently subjective.
Push
Mar 26, 2021
#15133
Big CatBig Cat

The Chicago Bulls are finally building a winning culture by trading for Nikola Vucevic

The Bulls basically took the entire Garpax regime and threw it in the trash can today, which was awesome. Vucevic coming to Chicago... I'm sick of missing the playoffs and getting the seventh pick and getting a guy that we have to wait on and hope is good. If you want to eventually be a team that can win in the playoffs, you have to make the playoffs. You have to have a culture of hey, we're trying to compete.

The Bulls did make the play-in/playoffs in subsequent years, but the Vucevic trade is widely regarded as a failure in hindsight as the team remained stuck in mediocrity.
Loss
Mar 26, 2021
#22046
Big CatBig Cat

The Heat made a great trade by acquiring Victor Oladipo from the Rockets

Oladipo to Miami is a great trade. Yeah, the Rockets somehow, the James Harden trade now is going to look even worse because they have nothing from that.

Oladipo only played 4 games for the Heat that season before suffering another season-ending injury, and his tenure in Miami was plagued by health issues, never living up to the 'great trade' billing.

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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Garrett Bolles should catch a pass before he retires

I want to be able to bet on Garrett Bolles to have one reception in every game. Because I feel like Sean Payton is going to try to get him that touch. He definitely will because he doesn't want him to retire as the guy who never touched the ball.

It requires Garrett Bolles to record a touch before the end of his career; that has not been resolved here.
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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Eagles' offense might be better without A.J. Brown

I actually think that the offense might be better without A.J. Brown.

Whether Philadelphia's offense performs better without A.J. Brown is a season-level comparative claim and is not reliably resolved here.
Void
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Chargers should eliminate their kicking game and go for it every time

The Chargers should just not have a punter. They should not have a kicker. They shouldn't even have like a long snapper on the team. Use those positions on somebody else and you're just—burn the boats. You're just going for it all the time. Fuck it. Who cares? Right? Season's over. Might as well try to score some points.

This is a deliberately satirical roster-building proposal, not a prediction that can be objectively graded.