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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Trevor Siemian was 'Wally Pipped' by Paxton Lynch.

Also, did Trevor Siemian just get Wally Pipped? Ooh. I think he did. He got Wally Pipped by Bill Paxton Lynch. Put him in a twister.

Siemian remained the primary starter for most of 2016 and 2017. Paxton Lynch proved to be a major bust and never permanently took the job.

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Void
Oct 3, 2016
#529
Big CatBig Cat

October is the best month of the sports year.

It's October. Best month of the year. Sports year by far. It's the only month where all four major sports will be in action. You got the MLB playoffs. You have all of rivalry weekends coming up for NCAA football. And NFL is starting to really cook.

The sentiment that October is the best sports month is subjective, though it is factually the only month where MLB, NFL, NBA, and NHL typically all have games.
Win
Oct 3, 2016
#530
Big CatBig Cat

Washington football is officially back.

Washington [Huskies] might be back. Well, they like to say like, oh yeah, Washington went to that Rose Bowl like 25 years ago.

Washington went 12-2 in 2016, won the Pac-12, and made the College Football Playoff. They were definitely 'back'.
Win
Oct 3, 2016
#531
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Tennessee is a lucky team that will eventually run out of luck.

Tennessee has been the Les Miles team this year. Les was good for a really long time, but then he would have four or five games that he had no business winning, that he would luck into. And then, like, you get off to a hot start, and then your luck runs out, and when it runs out, it runs out hard. Real hard.

After a 5-0 start with several miracles (App State, Georgia Hail Mary), Tennessee lost 3 straight games and finished a disappointing 9-4.

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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Garrett Bolles should catch a pass before he retires

I want to be able to bet on Garrett Bolles to have one reception in every game. Because I feel like Sean Payton is going to try to get him that touch. He definitely will because he doesn't want him to retire as the guy who never touched the ball.

It requires Garrett Bolles to record a touch before the end of his career; that has not been resolved here.
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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Eagles' offense might be better without A.J. Brown

I actually think that the offense might be better without A.J. Brown.

Whether Philadelphia's offense performs better without A.J. Brown is a season-level comparative claim and is not reliably resolved here.
Void
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Chargers should eliminate their kicking game and go for it every time

The Chargers should just not have a punter. They should not have a kicker. They shouldn't even have like a long snapper on the team. Use those positions on somebody else and you're just—burn the boats. You're just going for it all the time. Fuck it. Who cares? Right? Season's over. Might as well try to score some points.

This is a deliberately satirical roster-building proposal, not a prediction that can be objectively graded.