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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

UConn is a wagon, but my 'minus sign' luck might be the kiss of death for them

Yukon is a wagon and that might be the kiss of death cuz I'm the minus sign of King and I'm about to lay a brick. I'm about to lay a brick on Yukon and it's given me vibes of how sure I was that there were gonna be no DOKs.

UConn won the national championship, so PFT's 'kiss of death' did not manifest.

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Void
Apr 3, 2023
#29385
Big CatBig Cat

Playing basketball in a football stadium is a knock against the atmosphere

It's a knock against the whole idea of playing basketball in a football stadium... it doesn't have, the arena doesn't rock as much, you know, it's not as loud.

Subjective take on arena atmosphere.
Void
Apr 3, 2023
#6338
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

San Diego State players struggle with free throws because they are too muscular from living on the beach

My theory on San Diego State... They're both too jacked up. Yeah, because they live on the beach in San Diego. So they're like, I gotta have guns swell when I go outside all the time. They're too strong and they don't have any touch on their fellow shots.

The take is inherently subjective and satirical, connecting free throw touch to beach culture.
Win
Apr 3, 2023
#6339
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

UConn will be officially crowned a 'Blue Blood' if they win the 2023 championship

We're officially crowning Yukon of Blue Blood if they win this championship. Right. Okay. Yes. I think I I don't know how you can argue otherwise they'd have five, they'd have five championships in the last 24 years.

UConn won the title, and the discussion surrounding their blue blood status became a major media talking point following the win.

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Open
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Garrett Bolles should catch a pass before he retires

I want to be able to bet on Garrett Bolles to have one reception in every game. Because I feel like Sean Payton is going to try to get him that touch. He definitely will because he doesn't want him to retire as the guy who never touched the ball.

It requires Garrett Bolles to record a touch before the end of his career; that has not been resolved here.
Open
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Eagles' offense might be better without A.J. Brown

I actually think that the offense might be better without A.J. Brown.

Whether Philadelphia's offense performs better without A.J. Brown is a season-level comparative claim and is not reliably resolved here.
Void
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Chargers should eliminate their kicking game and go for it every time

The Chargers should just not have a punter. They should not have a kicker. They shouldn't even have like a long snapper on the team. Use those positions on somebody else and you're just—burn the boats. You're just going for it all the time. Fuck it. Who cares? Right? Season's over. Might as well try to score some points.

This is a deliberately satirical roster-building proposal, not a prediction that can be objectively graded.