The Pelicans are getting revenge on the Blazers because they took their hurricane logo personally

New Orleans saw that the Blazers have a hurricane as their logo, and they took it personally. And they're pissed off. Yep, they took all their angst out.

LeBron James and the Cavaliers will not win the Eastern Conference this year

We also have LeBron, who they're not winning the East... But when you score 40 and can barely win the game, your teammates stink and your team stinks.

The Timberwolves are the saddest team in the world

The Timberwolves are the saddest team in the world. They are pretty bad. There's no really redeeming quality to watching them play.

The Knicks will probably win the series in five games or even sweep the Cavs

I still think that the, the Knicks are probably gonna win in five. They could even pull off the sweep. I guess the only real question we have for you, 'cause we already, we declared that the New York Knicks have won the series after game one. Correct.

The NBA should rebrand the 'granny shot' as the 'pimp grip' to encourage players to use it

Nobody, no player in the NBA wants to shoot a free throw granny style. But if it's pimp grip, that sounds pretty fucking cool. Listen, if it goes in, it doesn't matter. Like if he and he would, he actually probably get some endorsements from it.

I want the Thunder to win so we can love Victor Wembanyama longer before the inevitable hate cycle starts

I know who I want to win. I want the Thunder to win this series. And the reason why I want the thunder to win this series is because I think if the thunder win, we get to restart the clock on how much longer we get to love Weby before we hate 'em. If the Spurs win this series and then they win their first championship and Weby dominates, we're gonna eventually hate Weby.