Takes

The Bills are just not a very good football team right now

I think I figured out what's wrong with the Bills. I think they just might not be a very good football team right now. ... they have Josh Allen and Josh Allen kicks ass. But he's not playing his best right now. The defense isn't playing their best right now. I think the Bills just aren't a very good team.

The Colts are the 'friskiest' team in the NFL

The fact that they're, they might be the friskiest team in the NFL. They're a well-coached team. They're frisky. They've won against some good opponents. It feels like they're in every game and they don't make a, I mean they made a bunch of mistakes today... but the Colts might be my friskiest team.

Deshaun Watson stinks

Deshaun Watson. Should we talk about Deshaun? Yeah, he stinks. He stinks. He stinks. He's, he's pretty bad. And they're paying him $230 million.

The Commanders should sell everyone and trade both Chase Young and Montez Sweat

I'm in blow it all up mode. I'm in, I'm in Trade everybody mode. This is a bad team. ... Trade both of 'em now. ... I'm in full tank mode.

Arthur Smith is a top three funniest coach on the sidelines

I think he's pretty close to top three funniest coaches on the sidelines. ... His reactions are so much better this year. It's like him and Pete Carroll. The mustache has done wonders for his slapstick comedy on the sidelines.

The Chargers are the best bad team in the NFL

I think the Chargers might be the best bad team. I didn't think about that because we weren't thinking of the Chargers as being a bad team. No, they're a bad team. They're a bad team.

Tyson Bagent is a competent NFL backup quarterback

I think he might've actually proven that he could, he's a competent backup quarterback in the league. That should, should stick around for a while. So I'm happy for him.

The Seahawks are a really good team that can compete with anyone in the NFC

I have a take. I think the Seahawks are really fucking good. ... I think the Seahawks a game could compete with anyone in the NFC. They have not played their A game ... I think if they ever come up with their A game, I think they have enough talent on both sides of the ball to compete with everyone.

The Rams are the most perfectly average team in the NFL

I think they're the most perfectly average team in the NFL right now. ... They're right in the middle where they, they'll just beat all the bad teams and lose to all the good ones.

The Chiefs have reached their final form and are now winning like the 2000s Patriots

The Chiefs, they've reached their final form of being the Patriots just dominating teams even so that like, they're now doing it a little bit different way where they're sneaking up. ... they're shape shifting and they're now winning in a completely, not a completely different way. ... they've changed it over a few times and they're still gonna keep winning.

Blink-182's new album 'One More Time...' is a banger

I'm just gonna put Blink-182 as being back. They dropped a new album on Friday. It sounds like it was recorded in 2005. I mean that in like the best way possible... It's a good album. I give it four balls out of five.

Jose Altuve is the most clutch baseball player since David Ortiz

Altuve might be the most clutch guy since Big Papi. Every big moment he comes up huge.

I only eat chicken tenders and don't like seafood

I have [had shrimp] but seafood's not really. Not really my thing. ... Chicken tenders. ... [Shirley Temples] I can get a Sprite whenever I want, but if I go to a restaurant or something, get a Shirley Temple. Class it up a little bit.

The Jacksonville Jaguars are Super Bowl contenders

Yeah. Super Bowl contenders. They Jaguars... They figured something out in the second half. They moved the ball well.

Jared Goff is a top-five quarterback this season

I think Jared Goff has been playing... I think he's a top five quarterback in terms of this season.

Jared Goff is currently playing at an MVP level

And Jared [Goff] is playing, I'm gonna say he's playing at MVP level right now. Agreed. He's, he's in the MVP discussion. We just added him to the conversation right now.

Benching Desmond Ridder would mean the Falcons are giving up on the season

I think if you benched Desmond Ridder right now, it's, you're done, you're done over him... You're giving up.

The Bills' Week 6 win over the Giants was actually a 'loss win'

The bills that they had, the win that they had against the Giants on Sunday night... it might be a loss win. A loss win. It might be a loss win.

I would rather the Phillies play the Rangers than the Astros in the World Series

I would rather play the Rangers. [than the Astros]

Texas A&M has the most delusional fanbase in college football because they think they are a perennial 11-win team

Texas a and m to me, most delusional fan base in college football... Why is it that Texas a and m thinks that they are a perennial 10 11 win team... Since 1995, they have won over 10 games twice. They won 11 games in 1998. And then Johnny Football. It's just a very funny like to, I again, you should aspire to be great, but to pretend like Texas a m is like, we deserve to be winning 10 games.

Iowa is the best team in college football to follow because they make people so angry by winning while being terrible on offense

I love this Iowa team so much because they make people so angry. They're so bad for their offense... People are going to be so, so angry about them playing in the Big 10 championship game. They have found, they've hacked the system. Offense is irrelevant. You could just win games in the Big 10 West by just playing defense and special teams.

I will work twice as hard in the winter so I can work half as much in the summer for golf

All I said is that I'm gonna work twice as hard as the winter so that I don't have to work. I can work twice as less and all in the summer. In the summer. Right. And then it all evens out. ... Europe, Europeans do it. Right. They take midday naps, siestas.

Jalen Carter is already a top-tier defensive player because he hits people differently than most 21-year-olds

He's a freak though. Like physically when you see him, you go, that's like, he's as wide as a refrigerator... he's got advanced skills for 21, 22 years old... Jalen Carter hits you, like he rocks you. He's just, he just hits people differently.

Jim Schwartz is the most important person on the Cleveland Browns defense

The defensive coordinator? Yeah. Jim Schwartz. He's the most important guy. They've had talent there in Cleveland. Now it's, it's elite right now... But you know, he's, he's a, he's a statistician mathematician. So numbers like he gets all that. But then he lets you know that this scheme and what we're running, this is why we're doing it... and then he just, you know, they just dog pressed [the 49ers] right outta the stadium.

The Detroit Lions are for real because they have transformed from the worst run defense into the best

I don't think [the Lions are fool's gold]. I think Jared's been playing incredible football... Last year they were the worst defensive football. Nobody was even close... They're the number one ranked run defensive football right now. Tampa Bay couldn't get two yards a carry last week. They play the game the right way.

Jared Goff is legitimately in the MVP conversation

No, they're 5 0 1. He's playing great football. The offense is dynamic. The guy's tough as can be. ... You're not gonna find a better quarterback than Jared Goff. And he knows, first of all, he's a lockstep with a really talented offense coordinator... He's not gonna play any better or go anywhere else like he is right now in Detroit.

I am not ready to declare the Titans dead because Mike Vrabel always finds a way to win

I'm actually not ready to declare the Titans dead yet. Because Vrabel always will have a game. Vrabel finds a way. The last time they started two and four, you know what they did? I think they made it all the way to the AFC Championship game.

The Ravens are currently good but lack the killer instinct to be great

I feel like the Ravens are in the good have not figured out how to be great category yet... they're not being able to step on a team's throat... they're not finishing drives and they're not letting teams just kind of linger around.

The Commanders are officially the streak-breakers of the NFL

The Commanders are officially the streak breakers of the NFL—streak breaking kings of the NFL. This was a 31 game home winning streak for Desmond Ridder that was snapped today. We beat the Ravens when they had their 24 game preseason streak. The Bears had a 14 game losing streak, the Commanders broke that last week. We broke the Eagles 8-0 streak last year. The Commanders just seem like streak breakers.

The Falcons could make the playoffs with any quarterback not named Desmond Ridder

The big story out of this is the Atlanta Falcons are good enough to go to the playoffs with any quarterback not named Desmond Ridder... If you got a B minus today, the Falcons win that game.

Tyreek Hill is the hardest player in the NFL to game plan for and the league's biggest mismatch

He is the hardest guy to game plan for. He's the biggest mismatch. Like just in terms of speed, because it really is like watching a different sport when he's running. I would say he may not be the best receiver in terms of catching the ball high, pointing the ball, catching in traffic. He is impossible to game plan for when he's healthy.

The Jaguars might be a top-tier team after winning three games in a row

The Jags looked good. Their defense looked very good... credit to the Jags. Two games in London, one against the Bills, and then coming back home. They've won three in a row. They've righted the ship after that Chiefs/Texans double loss... the Jags might be good.

The New York Jets are actually a good football team

Are The Jets Good? I think they might be good. They're three and three... They played the Bills, the Cowboys, the Eagles, the Chiefs. They're two and two against those teams... I think the Jets might be good.

Silent walking is a ridiculous Gen Z trend that just describes thinking

My who's back the week is a new trend. It's called Silent Walking... walking without your phone... this person has never had an inner dialogue. I have an inner dialogue every day. I'm doing a lot of thinking. I got multiple dialogues.

The Braves are soft and complainers after their playoff exit

This series [we learned] Braves kind of soft, kind of complainers. If you're a Braves fan, you won a World Series a couple years ago, you'd be happy with that. But now you seem pretty soft. This postseason between the complaining about a reporter tweeting out an accurate statement from the clubhouse... gimme a fucking break.

The Diamondbacks are scary and should not be taken lightly

The [Diamondbacks] are scary. The Diamondbacks are scary. They're very scary. I'm not—Zac Gallen is for real. I'm not looking at that team lightly at all.

Andy Reid is playing the NFL on 'expert mode' because he's bored

I think Andy Reid is bored with the NFL. I think Andy Reid is—he's made himself play the NFL on expert mode with the weird shit that he's obsessed with doing. Because I think that this Chiefs offense, if they wanted to play just normal football, would've beaten the fuck out of the Broncos. But they do all these weird plays, almost like Andy is just like—he's playing with his food.

The NFL London games have lost their allure and are now a burden

I'm kind of sick of the London game. I like the early football. I'm sick of the fact that they have made something that was unique and different into just every week. This is the third week in a row. They're just changing the schedule on us. Now it doesn't feel cool and unique, it just feels like a burden.

I am officially back in on Justin Fields as the guy for the Bears

The Bears might be back if they win this game. And I am all the way back into Justin Fields. I liken it to a relationship where, listen, Justin Fields threw some interceptions, I said some things... but at the end of the day, don't go to bed angry. So I'm no longer going to bed angry. He's the guy again.

David Tepper is a meddling owner who is hurting the Panthers

[David Tepper] basically in those two quotes was like, 'Yeah, this guy is putting his nose where it shouldn't be and micromanaging a football team.' And that's not how a successful organization runs. You can't have the owner forcing the coach to have a meeting multiple times a week. He sounds like a miserable person to work for.

Dante Scarnecchia was the actual GOAT coach of the Patriots dynasty

I think as a podcast we should actually change the debate and make it Dante Scarnecchia was the GOAT. Why not? Option three.

Bryce Harper embodies the city of Philadelphia more than any superstar

I'm so jealous of Philly fans because you got a player that is a superstar potential Hall of Famer someday. And he's such a dirtbag—like Phillies fans. He is one of them. When he signed his deal, he was like 13 years, I don't want any opt-outs, I want to die here. Bury me in Philly. He embodies everything that fan base is all about.

The Astros have proven they never needed to cheat to be successful

What they've proven to me—and should be to a lot of people—is that they never had to cheat in the first place. Whether or not they would've won in 2017, that remains to be seen... but as far as getting there seven straight [ALCSs], I don't think that they needed to cheat to do that. They were talented all along.

Winning in the MLB Playoffs is almost entirely about hitting home runs

The formula for Playoff success: good pitching, good defense, hit homers. And the D-backs are hitting homers. It's not about grinding out at-bats and wearing down the pitcher. It's: can you hit homers at a rate that you can out-homer the other team? The Playoffs is all about hitting home runs.

The MLB should move back to a one-game Wild Card and make the Division Series a best-of-seven

I want to mix up the Playoff format again. I want to go back to the one-game Playoff for the Wild Card, and then I want to make the Division Series best-of-seven. I think it rewards teams with more depth. Something specific to the Braves-Philly series... this deserves to be seven games.

Albus Dumbledore is a piece of shit for setting Harry Potter up to die

As I'm watching them [the Harry Potter movies], dude, Dumbledore's a piece of shit. He knew that Harry had to sacrifice himself. He set him up. The guy that you think is like the grandpa that's always there to help him... he's a bad sicko.

Books are always better than the movies

Michael Lewis books—always better than the movie. Big Short? Ever heard of it? Moneyball? Ever heard of it? Blindside? Books are always better than the movie.

I only enjoy watching baseball when my team is on offense

What I said was... I like when my team is on offense, and I don't like when my team is on defense. [It's because] in the short series, every [pitch] is so important. You lose one and you're just back that much.

You would always rather give up a solo home run than a walk in the 9th

Top of the ninth, up 3-1. First batter. Would you rather give up a walk or a solo shot? I'd rather give up a solo shot. [Because with a walk] all of a sudden the tying run is on base and it's just all the nerves. Tension. I texted Dan Haren and he said 'no question you'd rather give up a solo shot.'

Jordan Love might suck

Jordan love might suck. I was smiling... He looked pretty bad. Both teams look bad.