Takes

Lionel Messi will choke in the 2022 World Cup

My sit is Lionel Messi. This is the time of the year... he's due for a choke in the fucking World Cup. He's not my goat. He's gonna put up a big fat goose egg in there going down.

Babe Ruth would not even be a Double-A player in today's game

I saw a video, someone found a video of like 19-whatever the fuck he was born, he had a shitty swing. He looked slow and fat. If he was in today's day and age, he wouldn't even fucking be in AA. Who the fuck out of him put down field stands that I'm taking away his pinstripes. I'd probably strike him out.

Jimmy Butler is a top-one player in the NBA

Jimmy Butler is a king, top one player in the NBA. He got fined due to attempting to escalate the situation and also for not snitching.

Kirk Cousins is statistically the best quarterback of all time.

Statistically, the best quarterback of all time.

Duke could beat the Cleveland Cavaliers

Zion Williamson, R.J. Barrett, Alex O'Connell. It's the big three, and Paul Pierce told them they could beat the Cavs, and they could. Dukes, yeah.

Eli Manning should just retire already

Fuck Eli Manning. How many times is Eli Manning going to sack himself when I put a little fucking cashola on the Giants in a Sunday night game? Fuck you, Eli Manning. Just retire, you fucking asshole.

Kareem Hunt is a fantasy football sleeper

He's a rookie, but I'm finally going to pick him up on my waiver wire. I'm talking about Kareem Hunt. He's my sleeper of the week.

Fantasy owners should be able to suspend their own players from real-life games

As a fantasy football owner, if I owned Odell Beckham, I think that it should be within my right to actually suspend him. From real games. If a high enough percentage of Odell Beckham Jr.'s fantasy football owners are mad at him for doing something, then let's say above 65%.