PMT DB
PMT DB
Ja Morant, Stu Feiner, and the Greatness of Joey Chestnut
Big Cat and PFT are back from the holiday weekend and diving straight into the Valley as the Suns took Game 1 of the NBA Finals. While the Bucks looked a little sluggish after their long weekend, Giannis Antetokounmpo made a return that defied medical logic after that gruesome-looking knee injury in the ECF. Big Cat is already preparing the paperwork for Giannis to join a very elite group of mutants.
Big CatGiannis Antetokounmpo belongs in the Adrian Peterson club of non-human physical recovery
I actually am totally fine with Giannis [Antetokounmpo] being put into the Adrian Peterson club of the people that just don't have knee ligaments or regular bodies that are anything like the human body because he was so injured and then he wasn't. And I don't know what happened in between, but it's just Giannis because he's a freak.
As for the actual game, it was the Chris Paul show. The Point God was making Bobby Portis look like he was playing on skates, and PFT is convinced that we are witnessing actual dark magic on the hardwood.
PFT CommenterChris Paul's elite dribbling and crossovers are literally witchcraft
[Chris Paul] went between both legs behind the back, I think, with both hands, threw in a couple crossovers. It is absolutely roasted. At that point, like, he's a witch. This guy is doing witchcraft right now. I can't be expected to defend against that.
With CP3 finally on the doorstep of a ring, the guys noted how LeBron James is suddenly the Suns' biggest cheerleader on Twitter. PFT thinks if CP3 gets his jewelry, LeBron deserves a little something for his service as the ultimate hype man.
PFT CommenterLeBron James should receive a championship ring if the Suns win the NBA Finals
If the Suns win, LeBron [James] should get a ring. Absolutely should get a ring. Absolutely, CP3's best friend. Listen, LeBron is putting this team on his back. He is willing the Suns to an NBA championship. I wouldn't be shocked if LeBron gets on one of the floats.
The Match and Soccer Talk
Outside of the Finals, we had The Match between Bryson DeChambeau/Aaron Rodgers and Phil Mickelson/Tom Brady. It was weird, it was awkward, and Bryson apparently brought a Google Doc of jokes that did not land. Big Cat gave all the credit to Lefty for making the event watchable. Meanwhile, Aaron Rodgers won the match and then looked like he might never touch a football again, which Big Cat is totally fine with if it means the bad man leaves the NFC North forever.
Big CatAaron Rodgers should retire from football right now following his win in The Match
I think speaking as a football fan, if Aaron Rodgers decided that was his last competitive event in the history of his life, I think us as fans would applaud him, and he doesn't owe us anything more, and next stop Canton.
Soccer is also taking over the middle of the day. Italy moved past Spain in a thriller, and PFT has officially identified the next global superstar in Federico Chiesa.
PFT CommenterFederico Chiesa is the next GOAT of soccer
That dude Chiesa, my guy Chiesa, he's the next GOAT. Like, we might be seeing a torch event happen in the next year, two years, where Messi passes that torch.
Ja Morant Joins the Show
NBA Rookie of the Year Ja Morant sat down with Big Cat and PFT to talk about his new documentary, *Promised Land*. Ja opened up about his "underdog mentality" and how being unranked in high school still drives him today. He also addressed his dad being his biggest hater and how he absolutely ignores the analytics department in Memphis.
Ja MorantI do not listen to analytics or efficiency numbers at all when playing basketball
I actually don't listen to [analytics] at all. Really just going out there and playing my game. Analytics and numbers say [floaters] aren't efficient, but as you can see, it's a lot of people in this league who use floaters or pull up tools and make them at a hot level. [A good shot] is the only thing that matters.
Ja didn't hold back on his current teammates either. Despite playing with guys from Duke, Gonzaga, and Michigan State, he knows exactly who would have won the college tournament if Murray State had the chance.
Ja MorantMy Murray State team would have beaten the college teams of my current NBA teammates
We all know Murray State would have beat all of them. [referring to Gonzaga, Duke, Michigan State teammates]
The Stu Feiner Experience
In one of the most chaotic segments in show history, the guys took a field trip to Long Island to interview Stu Feiner in his basement. It was pure Stuey from start to finish. He discussed his health, his "surreal strength," and his incredibly deep history with legendary bodybuilder Steve Michalik. Stu also gave a surprisingly thoughtful, yet typically insane, breakdown of why he prefers the logic of Scientology over traditional religions.
Stu FeinerThe logic of Scientology makes the most sense compared to other religions
Scientology is a way to answer questions. Religion is a way of answering questions. Before any of them start extorting you for money and then they all become frauds, Scientology makes the most sense.
Stu also reflected on his legendary gambling career, including the time he gave out a 1,000-unit lock that resulted in one of the most lopsided losses in the history of the program. He remains unbothered, claiming his athletic peak was on par with some of the greatest to ever do it.
Stu FeinerI am a superhuman athlete on the level of Jesse Owens and Jim Brown
I'm superhuman. In seventh grade, 1974, Long Island, it was Jesse Owens, Jim Brown, Stu Feiner. I mean, that's how it went down. I was a legend.
Who's Back and Hot Seat/Cool Throne
With the holiday break in the rearview, the guys caught up on some missed items. Joey Chestnut is once again the king of the world after eating 76 hot dogs. Big Cat isn't even joking when he says Joey is the pinnacle of human performance.
Big CatJoey Chestnut is pound-for-pound the greatest athlete of all time
I really do think pound for pound [Joey Chestnut] is the greatest athlete of all time. Maybe you could say Secretariat, but I don't. No, I think... Joey Chestnut has won 14 titles now. 14. No one has ever won that many titles at anything.
Finally, the show wrapped with some love for Shohei Ohtani, who is doing things in baseball that haven't been seen in a century. Big Cat is all in on the Ohtani hype train, and PFT has a simple request for Commissioner Rob Manfred regarding the Japanese superstar's "supplements."
PFT CommenterRob Manfred should refuse to drug test Shohei Ohtani for the good of the sport
Rob Manfred, do not piss test Shohei Ohtani whatever you do. I don't care what he's on right now. The only way you could fuck this up is if you stuck a little test strip into a stream of urine and then you just were just a big bummer for America.
If the Suns win Game 2, we might be looking at a sweep, but at least we'll always have Stu Feiner's blood sugar readings.
