Matt Jones Rear Admiral And Not Mark Cuban

Jimmy Kimmel intentionally planned the La La Land / Moonlight Oscar mistake

Even if Jimmy Kimmel didn't plan this, which I think he did, he should be blamed for it for all the shitty Jimmy Kimmel pranks he did in the past.

The Oscars would be better if the celebrities were made gradually more uncomfortable

I would like to watch the Oscars a lot more if instead of treating the celebrities to things, they gradually made them more uncomfortable as the show went on. Like crank the heat up five degrees every hour or something like that. So they were just a big sweaty mess at the end.

John Calipari will stay at Kentucky until he retires, then go into broadcasting or politics

I actually think he'll retire here and then he'll go into broadcasting. Or he talks about privately running for Senate. And I know that seems crazy, but I could totally see him in four years running against Mitch McConnell.

John Wall and DeMarcus Cousins will eventually play together in the NBA

I actually think there's a decent – I think [John Wall] and [DeMarcus Cousins] will play together before they're done. They've been saying that for years.

The Washington Capitals are the Atlanta Falcons of the NHL

They're kind of like the Atlanta Falcons where their franchise has just never won it. The Falcons have been to two Super Bowls. I think the Capitals have been to one Stanley Cup. Basically, it's a franchise of failure. You know, they have this great regular season success. Everybody gets excited. And then when it comes to perform, they're a pop shot.

Hidden Figures is my lock for Best Picture at the Oscars

Hidden figures... That's what my money's on. Very professionally produced.

Shaquille O'Neal is a victim of 'athlete funny' and is not actually humorous

Shaq has always been a victim of athlete funny. Where someone in the locker room once told Shaq he was funny, and he has gone with that throughout his whole career thinking he is actually humorous, and people want to hear Shaq tell jokes when in reality he's not funny.

Baker Mayfield will get NFL starts solely because of his name

I'm going to put a little flyer on Baker Mayfield. You guys know I'm a big name guy. All-time name. That name is going to get him some starts in the NFL. It's going to get him some places. People are going to take some shots with Baker Mayfield solely because of his name and then be like, ooh, maybe he's not that good.

LaVar Ball is like a bird that sits on a rhino and shits everywhere

[Lonzo Ball's] father is going to be over his shoulder the whole time. His father is like one of those birds that sits on the back of a rhino and shits everywhere. That's what he's going to be.

Being tired is a more hardcore injury than a broken bone for a 32-year-old

As someone who's 32 years old, being tired, I would rather have a broken bone than be tired. Being tired is the most hardcore injury that I have these days.