PMT DB
PMT DB
Roger Bennett on World Cup Predictions and U.S. Open Chaos
Big Cat and PFT Commenter are coming to you live from Shinnecock Hills, and they aren't just there to watch the best golfers in the world. They’re there to watch the course absolutely ruin lives. The guys have full credentials, which mostly means Big Cat is getting high on free media tent ice cream while PFT is testing the limits of the USGA dress code by roaming the grounds in a tank top.
Watching the world's best struggle with the fescue has turned Big Cat into a total sadist. He’s found himself actively cheering for the bunker sand and the wind over any actual human holding a club.
Big CatI'm rooting for the course to beat the players at the U.S. Open
I actually love the course so much, I found myself chanting today in my head, go course, go. Go course, go. Because, like, the course – I mean, Bryson DeChambeau said it was clown golf. That's when you know a course has you, like, beat.
PFT is equally impressed by the carnage, even if he thinks the aesthetic of the course leaves a little to be desired. He described it as a "wagon" because of how it's systematically destroying scorecards, though he didn't pull any punches when it came to certain former quarterbacks who keep talking about qualifying.
PFT CommenterThe course at Shinnecock Hills is a 'wagon' because it's dominating every golfer in the field
I'm telling you what, this course is a wagon. Every single golfer got shit pumped today except for, what, Dustin Johnson? ... The course is awesome. The fescue is kicking people's ass.
PFT CommenterTony Romo is a fraud for talking about qualifying for the U.S. Open for five years and never doing it
I would like to see Tony Romo. Wasn't there talk of Tony Romo qualifying for a U.S. Open? ... So is he a fraud? I mean, he's been talking about it for the last five years. I don't know.
While wandering the media tent, Big Cat had a run-in with the legend himself, Rick Reilly. It was a classic alpha moment where Big Cat got stuck sitting down while Reilly towered over him, making small talk about how Barstool is "big with the young people." It was a crushing defeat for Dan, but at least he saw a woman in a wheelchair stand up just to get a glimpse of Tiger Woods. That is the power of Eldrick.
Talking Soccer with Roger Bennett
With the World Cup kicking off, Roger Bennett from Men in Blazers joined the show to discuss his recent American citizenship and why he loves this country more than Kenny Powers does. Roger, a Liverpudlian by birth, provided some much-needed geographical context for his hometown.
Roger BennettLiverpool is the Baltimore of England
Liverpool was a dark place, burning itself down. A bit like Baltimore. It's the Baltimore of England. ... And when I grew up, it was burning itself down under Margaret Thatcher.
The conversation shifted to the 2018 World Cup field, where Roger tried to explain the greatness of Messi versus Ronaldo. While Big Cat is convinced Ronaldo is just a goal-poaching specialist, Roger sticks to the pure magic of the little guy from Argentina.
Roger BennettMessi is the greatest footballer ever, better than Cristiano Ronaldo
I am always Team Messi. Always. Messi is the greatest footballer I have ever seen in my life for so many different reasons.
Big CatCristiano Ronaldo is the Mike Tolbert of soccer because he just poaches goals from one yard out
He just runs it in from one yard out. The team gets all the way down, and they're like, all right, go ahead. Give it to the fat guy. He'll run it in. That's Ronaldo.
They also touched on the eternal question of American soccer: What if our best athletes played the beautiful game? Roger is convinced that if LeBron James had been born with a soccer ball at his feet instead of a basketball, the rest of the world wouldn't stand a chance. He even threw out the idea of a prime Muggsy Bogues being the American Messi.
Roger BennettLeBron James would have been the greatest soccer player ever if he played as a kid
If [LeBron James] played when he was a little kid, would he be the best ever? ... Muggsy Bogues could have been our Lionel Messi. Five foot six, innocuous looking, incredibly coordinated.
As for who is actually going to hoist the trophy in Russia, Roger warned the guys not to count out the home team, mostly because of the specific "incentives" Vladimir Putin might provide. However, when pushed for a stone-cold lock, he went with a perennial heavyweight.
Roger BennettDon't bet against Russia in the World Cup because FIFA always lets host dictators win for propaganda
I wouldn't bet against Russia. ... FIFA... they've got a history of dropping [the World Cup] into the hornet's nest of dictators looking for an easy propaganda win.
Roger BennettSpain will win the 2018 World Cup
America will love the circus. So who's going to win? Spain will win. Spain's going to win.
Ass in the Jackpot and Life Advice
The show introduced a brand new segment called "Ass in the Jackpot" following the viral leaked audio of MLB umpire Tom Hallion arguing with Mets manager Terry Collins. It’s the greatest piece of sports audio in years, and the guys are rightfully furious that Major League Baseball is trying to scrub it from the internet.
Big CatMLB is stupid for deleting the Terry Collins viral 'Ass in the Jackpot' video
They finally had a video where people were like, this is awesome. This is fun. ... You should actually start doing that and show just umps and managers yelling at each other about asses in the jackpot. They did the exact opposite because they're MLB. They pulled it.
We also got a "Problematic" segment for Stephen A. Smith after his appearance on Snoop Dogg's show. Stephen A. outed himself as a "bottom feeder," which led to a discussion on why his specific brand of commentary is even funnier when applied to his personal life. Big Cat, ever the romantic, thinks Stephen A. needs to appreciate the triple-threat of a woman's brain, heart, and soul.
Big CatStephen A. Smith's claim of being a 'bottom feeder' is problematic for not respecting the whole woman
Stephen A. Smith, problematic is the fact that you don't respect women because you should be boobs, butt, and brain. Three Bs. That's the original Big Baller brand. Why are you putting, a woman's body should be put on a pedestal?
To wrap up, the guys shared some life advice for their younger selves. Hank, newly 25, focused on the horrors of administrative tasks like renewing a driver's license. PFT gave a stern warning to any young fans looking to join more than two fantasy football leagues, while Big Cat looked back at his own physical limitations with a sense of urgency.
PFT CommenterLimit yourself to two fantasy football leagues; anything more and it's not fun anymore
Limit yourself to two fantasy football teams. So that's the perfect amount. Studies have shown that's the perfect amount of fantasy football leagues to be in anymore and it's not fun anymore.
Big CatLearn how to dunk before you turn 30, because you won't be able to after
Learn how to dunk. Like, you're not going to be able to dunk when you're over 30. Because, I mean, if I had tried to dunk, I never tried to dunk under 30. So I don't even know if I could have dunked. I probably could have. Now it's too late.
If you haven't learned to dunk by 30, it’s time to start looking into a very comfortable couch for the rest of your life.
