PMT DB
PMT DB
Zach Harper and Ricky Williams on NBA Playoffs and Astro-Crypto
LeBron James got absolutely smoked by the Celtics in Game 1, but he wants everyone to know he has a photographic memory. Big Cat and PFT Commenter weren't exactly buying the post-game magic trick where LeBron recited a 30-second sequence of the game to distract everyone from the fact that the Cavs looked like a JV team. While LeBron remains unconcerned, PFT Commenter thinks the Brad Stevens experience might be too much for Cleveland to handle.
PFT CommenterThe Celtics are a problem for the Cavaliers
I think it's a problem. I mean, everybody's saying, okay, LeBron's going to just snap back into LeBron. But Brad Stevens, the mad scientist, looks like he's just completely outmatching the Cavs. The Cavs suck, besides LeBron.
The guys also leaned into the absurd idea that the Celtics are actually flourishing because their stars are on the bench. It turns out that when you remove Kyrie Irving and Gordon Hayward, you just get the most cohesive unit in basketball.
PFT CommenterThe Celtics are better off without Kyrie Irving and Gordon Hayward
They're a better team without Kyrie and Gordon Hayward. Yeah, everyone keeps saying, well, they'll have their two best players back next year. Well, do you really want that? No, you don't. You get rid of them. You dump those salaries. Yeah, you reload on draft picks. Yeah, you sign Terry Rozier to a 10-year contract.
Who's Back and The Caps Wagon
Who's Back of the Week featured PFT Commenter celebrating "Future Me" for finally cashing the check that "Past Me" wrote with the infamous poop-eating bet. The Washington Capitals are officially an absolute wagon, and PFT is convinced this is the best they've ever looked, mostly because they've stopped running into hot goalies and started actually passing the puck.
PFT CommenterThe 2018 Washington Capitals are playing better than any version of the team in history
I'm telling you, this Capitals team is playing better than any Washington Capitals team than I've ever seen with the exception of like every Washington Capitals team between the month of October and February.
Hank brought some hard-hitting millennial news to the table, noting that while the generation is accused of killing everything from Applebee's to the housing market, they are single-handedly propping up the frozen food industry.
HankMillennials are saving the frozen food industry
Frozen food is also back. So a lot of people bash us millennials and say we're only good for avocados and things of that nature. But it turns out that millennials are saving the frozen food industry.
Big Cat also debuted his latest stroke of genius: a plan to dominate the true crime genre. After watching *Evil Genius*, he realized the formula is incredibly simple and doesn't require much more than a drone and a couple of guys in windbreakers.
Big CatEvery crime drama can be successful with just interviews and aerial drone shots
We need to do a crime drama because essentially all you have to do is interview a couple like FBI or ATF guys and then mix in a shitload of drone shots of where, around where it happened. Like, Making a Murderer, it was just half drone shots. Evil genius, half drone shots.
Zach Harper Breaks Down the Brackets
Zach Harper joined the show to discuss why the Cavs are in such deep trouble. The mismatch on the court is one thing, but Zach thinks the real disaster is on the sidelines, where Ty Lue is being lapped by the Celtics' coaching staff.
Zach HarperTy Lue is the worst coach to ever win an NBA championship
The biggest mismatch of the series is Brad Stevens versus Ty Lue. Like, Tyronn Lue is a terrible coach. He's the worst coach to ever win a championship, and the fact that he's got to match Brad Stevens, like, that sucks for the Cavs.
However, Zach did offer a glimmer of hope for the LeBron stans, suggesting that the Celtics’ young core might eventually remember they are rookies and let the wheels fall off.
Zach HarperEverything will fall apart for the Celtics later in the series
And then the Celtics will go back to, like, Terry Rozier won't be able to hit a shot anymore, and Jason Tatum will look like a rookie, and Al Horford will be with a Kardashian or something. Everything's going to fall apart.
Moving to the Western Conference Finals, Big Cat is fully prepared for a classic James Harden disappearing act. He’s putting all his chips on a specific X-factor to keep the Rockets competitive against the Golden State machine.
Big CatClint Capela is the X-factor for the Rockets against the Warriors
The key to the series to you, I'm going to throw out a name... Clint Capela because he's like that extra dimension that could actually guard, you know, stop these guys attacking the rim and stop, you know, basically everything. And also he does really well with the pick and roll with Chris Paul and James Harden and then going to the hoop for lobs.
Astro-Wellness with Ricky Williams
Heisman winner and legendary free spirit Ricky Williams hopped on to read the guys their horoscopes. It wasn't just about "rebels" and "storytellers," though; it was about the financial future. Ricky, who famously used astrology to time his Bitcoin buys, gave the guys some very specific advice on whether to hop into the crypto market.
Ricky WilliamsBig Cat should buy Bitcoin, but PFT Commenter should stay away
Should you buy Bitcoin? I would say for Big Cat, I'd say for sure do it. For PFT, I would say not a good idea for you right now.
To wrap things up, the guys hit on PR 101 for Jordan Spieth after a disastrous snowman on the 18th hole. Big Cat thinks there’s a simple aesthetic distraction that would make everyone forget about the triple-putt immediately.
Big CatJordan Spieth should take off his hat so people only focus on him being bald rather than his bad golf
Spin Zone or PR 101, [Spieth] can just take off his hat and people be like, oh shit, you're bald. That's the bald guy. So no one will remember that you did the snowman thing.
It doesn't matter how many points LeBron scores if he can't remember where he parked the bus.
