Joe Flacco will eventually play for the Steelers because Mike Tomlin respects him so much

I think one day [Joe Flacco] is gonna end up playing for the Steelers. Because Mike Tomlin absolutely hates Joe Flacco. He respects him and he hates playing against him.

The Bengals will finish 10-7 if they beat the Jets and the Bears in their next two games

If they beat the Jets and the Bears... that would be five and four. They play the Patriots, Ravens, Bills, Ravens. Let's say they go one and three there... that would make 'em six and seven. Then they beat the Dolphins, Cardinals and Browns to finish the season. By my math, that's 10 and seven.

The Dodgers are going to beat the fuck out of every other team in the playoffs

I think the Dodgers are gonna beat the fuck out of every other team and it's not even gonna be close.

Fettuccine Alfredo is fake Italian food.

Alfredo's not real Italian. There's no heavy cream in Italian cuisine. Alfredo's fake Italian. He [Rick Pitino] would maybe do a lemon chicken, maybe do a lemon chicken Piccata. But Alfredo... Cacho e pepe, that's Italian. But there's no heavy cream in Italian cuisine.

The Sixers are a bad team that loses every game Joel Embiid doesn't play

The Sixers suck. The Sixers are a bad team. Embiid's not playing. They lose—the Sixers are back to losing every game that Embiid doesn't play.

My 'dinner simulator' habit of building food orders and not buying them is a sign of good self-control

Instead of going and making myself a snack or making myself food or ordering food, I'll just pull up the apps, Uber Eats... and I'll just like put together an order of what I would order if I were to get something. And then I clear my cart and I go to bed... It's really good self-control.