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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The US government uses Taylor Swift news to distract from alien craft revelations

In fact, I went up to our friend Kelly Keegs, who is maybe the biggest Taylor Swift fan in the entire world. I was like, so did you hear about The Aliens? And she was like, what Aliens? Taylor might be working for the United States government and they just told her like, Hey Taylor, please dump your boyfriend right now because we need to cover up the alien thing.

It is a satirical conspiracy theory that cannot be factually proven or disproven.

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Jun 7, 2023
#1955
Big CatBig Cat

Jay Monahan is the biggest scumbag in the world

Jay Monahan, the biggest scumbag in the world, the biggest scumbag in the world. He brought in 9/11 families to act as a human shield for what he was doing behind the scenes, which was negotiating with the LIV tour to try to make the PGA tour more money in the long run. While again telling the golfers on the PGA tour, don't do business with these people. They are evil. So yes, he's the biggest piece of shit in the world.

This is a subjective moral judgment and personal opinion.
Win
Jun 7, 2023
#1956
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

LIV Golf comes out of the merger looking like the Michael Scott Paper Company

The LIV tour, by the way, they come out of this smelling like roses. They're the Michael Scott Paper Company comparably to the PGA tour. They started their own tour. Everybody laughed at 'em. Their ratings were bad. But at some point along the way, the PGA tour needed the LIV tour just as much as the LIV guys needed the PGA tour.

LIV successfully forced the PGA to the table, effectively validating their disruptive strategy.
Win
Jun 7, 2023
#24124
Big CatBig Cat

In 10 years, PGA players will realize the LIV merger was the moment they started making a lot more money

It's gotta suck to be a PGA tour player today because they were blindsided. [But] in like 10 years they'll probably look back and be like, yeah, we did make a lot more money. They already are making more money because of the PGA having to compete with LIV. They're probably all gonna make a shitload more money now.

PGA Tour purses and signature event prize pools have indeed ballooned since the merger announcement, with the 'PIF' investment intended to further solidify this growth.

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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Maxx Crosby to the Ravens is a great move that makes their defense scary

Congrats to the Ravens. Congrats to Jesse Minter. This is a good, a great move. Their defense is gonna be scary. I love the transition from Maxx Crosby was always meant to be playing in a badass uniform. Raiders to Ravens, it's like, okay.

The trade is real and the Ravens defense is historically elite.
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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Cowboys 'monitoring' every situation is just a facade for doing nothing

Thoughts and prayers to the Dallas Cowboys who are now leading the NFL in number of guys that they're monitoring... they've been monitoring every situation. So they were monitoring the Crosby situation extremely closely. And they're very disappointed that they did not get Maxx Crosby, despite the fact that they're monitoring.

It's a satirical take on the Cowboys' lack of action in free agency/trades.
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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Kyler Murray's next team will reveal whether he actually cares about football

I think where Kyler decides to go is going to be very interesting. Yeah. Because no, no matter where he goes, I think we'll be able to say some very definitive statements about Kyler that might, might be wrong, but we'll definitely say them. If he goes to the Jets, it's like, oh, Kyler wanted to take a paycheck. Right. And he still doesn't care about football. Right.

Kyler Murray's reputation for 'not caring' is a long-standing trope that would likely be applied to a paycheck-driven move.

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