Dustin Johnson should have followed the Tiger Woods handbook and winced his way through a few holes before withdrawing

In true Tiger Woods fashion, [Dustin Johnson] should have winced and keeled over, hit a couple shots. Maybe see if he gets like a birdie to start and then keep playing. And if not, then quit and withdraw. That's the Tiger Woods handbook.

Something is fishy about Dustin Johnson's staircase injury

Dustin Johnson, allegedly fell down a staircase with socks on. We got some tips on what exactly happened because we all agree we don't buy it, right? There's something fishy going on here.

Pimento cheese sandwiches at the Masters are probably overrated

I know what a pimento cheese sandwich is, but I'm guessing that it's not as unbelievable as everyone's making it off to be.

No species has ever created another species through procreation

I don't believe in evolution in the sense that a dog mating with a dog makes a dog. No species has ever created another species through procreation.

I am not a Hall of Famer by my own standards

In my Hall of Fame, no. I think I was pretty good. I think I was better than everybody in the history of the game in October. Was I a Hall of Famer? In my Hall of Fame, no.

Mike Mussina is not a Hall of Famer

[Big Cat: Mike Mussina?] Ooh. I'd have to look at his numbers... As soon as you pause, it's a no.