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HankHank

If the Celtics win the championship, I am going to shave my head

If the Celtics win the championship, I am gonna shave my head. So maybe I'll get a taste of what that looks like. ... I'm gonna start trying to do some preemptive [hair loss] things. I'm probably gonna stop wearing a hat as much.

The Celtics won the 2024 NBA Championship and Hank eventually followed through on the pledge.

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Win
Apr 26, 2024
#3228
Big CatBig Cat

Ryan Poles' trade with the Panthers is one of the greatest fleeces in NFL history

Ryan Poles, what he did to the Panthers... I actually feel bad for the Panthers. Like it's, it's, it's gross... DJ Moore, Darnell Wright, Tyrique Stevenson, Caleb Williams and a 2025 second rounder. And they got Bryce Young. Ryan Poles. And now Rome Odunze. David Tepper... Basically every quarterback that's ever put on a Bear's uniform has been not put in the a good situation to succeed. He's doing everything to make sure that Caleb Williams succeeds.

The trade is widely regarded as one of the most lopsided in modern NFL history given the haul of players and picks the Bears received versus Bryce Young's early struggles.
Win
Apr 26, 2024
#22692
Big CatBig Cat

The 2024 NFL Draft set a record with the first 14 picks being offensive players

The first 14 picks were offense. So you didn't get a defensive player until number 15. ... which has never been done. It was insane.

This is a verifiable fact about the 2024 NFL Draft results.
Void
Apr 26, 2024
#3229
Big CatBig Cat

Michael Penix Jr. to the Falcons is a baffling move that makes zero sense

The Atlanta Falcons who, if you remember, signed Kirk Cousins to $180 million deal what like a month and a half ago, selected Michael Penix Jr. with the eighth pick... It makes zero sense to do it. Now if he's a great quarterback, cool. I hope it pans out. But like when he, is he gonna start? Is he gonna sit for two years? Why you such a high pick for this? It, it just, you could've probably gotten him in the second round.

While Penix could be a future star, the process of paying $180M to Cousins and then using the #8 pick on his successor immediately was universally panned by analysts.

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HankHank

Fanatics and Nike failed American fans by not producing enough USA hockey jerseys after the gold medal win

My Hot Seat: Fanatics and Nike... They thought that Canada was gonna win the gold, so they just did not make enough USA jerseys. And so by the time USA won the gold, they were already sold out. It's disgusting. Drop the ball.

The inventory levels are fact-verifiable; if they were sold out immediately, the claim is correct.
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HankHank

Heat 2 will be a 'disgusting' (great) film starring Christian Bale and Leonardo DiCaprio

My Cool Throne: Heat 2. Christian Bale. Leonardo DiCaprio. Disgusting film. Hell yes. I trust Jake Hamilton. He reported it. Christian Bale, Leo DiCaprio, Heat 2. I'm in. Awesome.

Casting rumors for Heat 2 are ongoing; if the film releases with these stars, it would be correct.
Void
HankHank

Jacob Bridgeman's wife is wrong; he is a better golfer than he is a person

Jacob Bridgeman... there was a clip on PGA tour posted from his wife that said he is a better person than he is a golfer. Not true. Not true, dude. You just won a PGA Tour tournament... You're a top 50 golfer alive right now. You're not top 50 human beings. Sorry buddy.

This is a subjective, comedic judgment of value.

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