Stetson Bennett is a future Hall of Famer

First, right off the top. Stetson Bennett, future Hall of Famer. Yeah. He looks good.

Justin Fields is officially 'the guy' and I am hate-bookmarking all slander against him

I am at the point now where there's a line in the sand. Is he the guy? Justin Fields is the guy. I've started hate bookmarking Justin Fields slander to come back to it later. He could play a perfect game and people would still nitpick him. Three for three, 129 yards, two touchdowns. The Bears look fucking awesome.

The female orgasm is a myth created by 'Big Orgasm'

The female orgasm. Not real. Big orgasm has been lying to you guys. Girls don't come. They just do it because they like to make us feel bad for coming too quick. Exactly... let's be honest, let's get real honest here. That shit's not real.

Josh Allen is a wild card who makes the offensive line have heart attacks throughout every game

Josh is a wild card, man. He makes us all have heart attacks throughout the game over and over and over. Like, when the world is watching and he's running and we're like, alright, here we go. Like literally the O-line, we look at each other and we're like, it's gonna happen. And then he jumps over somebody or he runs through somebody and then he hits the ground and we're like, oh.

I would literally die for Josh Allen

Would I die for Josh Allen? Absolutely I would, I would die for him, man. He's done nothing but great things for me and my family. And I take it personal, like I really take it personal.

NFL practice is actually harder without pads than it is with pads

I think practice is harder without pads than it is with pads... because it's hard to differentiate from the trenches when you're in the trenches. It's physical all of the time. It's just the standard of physical... we might as well just put the pads on.