Anything said at a championship parade should be protected by client-patient confidentiality

Anything you say at a Championship parade should be, that's like, that's client patient confidentiality. You can't, can't hold that against anybody. You're drunk at a parade. You're gonna say what you want.

The Jeremy Grant contract was the straw that broke the camel's back for Damian Lillard

The biggest loser in free agency is Jeremy Grant. Jeremy Grant got 150 million to return to the Trailblazers. Now on paper you're like, wow, that's a great deal. But the contract was the straw that broke the camel's back for Dame. He was like, this is, this is what we're doing in free agency. We're resigning Jeremy Grant. Yeah, fuck you guys. I'm out.

The theory that Portland should treat Dame Lillard 'correctly' to attract future free agents is the dumbest theory in the world

The the theory that the Blazers should treat Dame correctly so that they could get future free agents is the dumbest theory in the world. They're not gonna get future free agents. They should get whatever they can get.

Fettuccine Alfredo is fake Italian food.

Alfredo's not real Italian. There's no heavy cream in Italian cuisine. Alfredo's fake Italian. He [Rick Pitino] would maybe do a lemon chicken, maybe do a lemon chicken Piccata. But Alfredo... Cacho e pepe, that's Italian. But there's no heavy cream in Italian cuisine.

The Sixers are a bad team that loses every game Joel Embiid doesn't play

The Sixers suck. The Sixers are a bad team. Embiid's not playing. They lose—the Sixers are back to losing every game that Embiid doesn't play.

My 'dinner simulator' habit of building food orders and not buying them is a sign of good self-control

Instead of going and making myself a snack or making myself food or ordering food, I'll just pull up the apps, Uber Eats... and I'll just like put together an order of what I would order if I were to get something. And then I clear my cart and I go to bed... It's really good self-control.