Nathaniel Hackett is booty cheeks

Nathaniel Hackett is booty cheeks. And if we didn't say that, then we're frauds. I will trash us for not trashing Nathaniel Hackett... he is, he wanted to talk about booty cheeks.

Commanders vs. Bears will lowkey be a banger of a game

I feel like next week Low Key might be a banger of a game. Oh, you never know. Cause these are the games that people are always like, it's gonna suck. Let's not watch... and everybody was like, Oh, we're not gonna watch this game. It was one of the greatest games ever.

The Bills will destroy the Steelers and Kenny Pickett in his first start

I am going with the Buffalo Bills. Okay. I think if Mitch [Trubisky] was playing, it's a different story... But it's Kenny Pickett. He's a rookie. He's gonna get destroyed by that defense.

Betting the over on Alabama basketball is a cheat code

Alabama by the way is a cheat code if you want to get in on it. It's just betting their overs. They just never stopped missing. This has been like, oh, two weeks now they're over under for the first half was 45 and a half points last night. They scored 69 in the first half.

I am offering a $10,000 bounty to find the UNC staffer who punched a Duke staffer

I will not sleep until we find this UNC staffer who punched one of your guys... Let's put a bounty on it. I will offer $5,000. [PFT]: I'll match. [Big Cat]: $10,000 if anyone can find the UNC person who punched a Duke staffer after the game. $10,000 cash. Give us the footage leading to their arrest.

Tua Tagovailoa's market value is non-existent relative to his contract

Everything's on the table for the Dolphins. Tua could be a fullback. What would you... What do you think the Dolphins would say yes to for a trade for Tua? Like a sixth round pick for Tua? A jugs machine? I don't know what the hell would Tua's market be?