Chris Jones' combine wardrobe malfunction was an all-time bad moment for white guys

Chris Jones at the combine, his [package] flop out at the end of his 40 run, which by the way... that was an all time bad moment for white guys because we were like, is that guy like, is he hard or something? That's not only his at rest perspective.

Chris Jones' physical endowment is a hate crime against white people

I think you could make the claim that it was maybe a hate crime against white people that that he looked so physically well endowed that his package straight up burst through his shorts while he was running.

Chris Jones should fully embrace the 'big dick' brand by wearing painted-on jeans to press conferences

I think he needs to just run with this and totally embrace it and always be the guy with a [large package]. Like show up to press conferences wearing like extremely tight pants. If you want to wear compression shorts, go for it. But if you have to wear jeans or whatever for the dress code, wear painted on jeans and just have that snake hanging down to your knee.

Paddy the Baddy is the next star of the UFC

Paddy the Baddy was electric. Paddy the Baddy is the next star of the UFC.

I bet LeBron James will announce his next team on Thursday using a golf ball gender reveal format

I think it's going to be like a gender reveal, but with a golf ball. And he's gonna hit the golf ball and it's gonna be the Cavs colors... Burgundy. Do it, do it Thursday. LeBron.

Andy Reid on a horse is a massive Mount Rushmore miss

Andy Reid should have been a pick. The more, just think about it, the more Andy Reid on a horse... that is so fucking funny.