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Big CatBig Cat

Blake Bortles should embrace male pattern baldness to avoid being hated

You need to let it go. Go full male pattern baldness. If you have a quarterback who has beautiful hair and is ascending and a great quarterback, people are going to come and start hating you. If you have a hilarious male pattern baldness, if you look like Larry David and you're an NFL quarterback... who's going to make fun of you?

Subjective advice on image and likability.

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Void
May 9, 2016
#27506
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Bob Costas is passionate about every sport he covers except for Sunday Night Football, where he sucks

Everything that [Bob Costas] attends, that's the kind of passion that Bob puts, except for Sunday night football. He sucks at that. He's like, 'hey, America, knock it off with the guns.' And then everyone's like, 'oh, shit, we should probably get rid of our guns.'

Subjective opinion on broadcasting quality and personality.
Push
May 9, 2016
#10760
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The 2016 Cubs are the best team in MLB history and will sweep the World Series

I think this might be the best baseball team in the history of Major League Baseball, and I think that there's no chance that anything bad could happen to them this year. Like, they're going to cruise. I think it's going to be four-game sweep in the World Series.

The Cubs did win the 2016 World Series, making the 'best team' claim arguable, but they did not sweep (won in 7 games).
Void
May 9, 2016
#10761
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Bryce Harper is a coward for taking intentional walks instead of swinging at pitch-outs

I actually think that Bryce Harper is a coward for not swinging at any of those pitches. Say what you want about Vlad Guerrero, but the guy would take a cut at a pitch out. My question is, if Harper doesn't like it so much, why does he put a stop to it and just take a running start and just groove one of the meatballs that's thrown outside?

This is an inherently subjective satirical take on player behavior.

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Big CatBig Cat

The Lions will win the NFC North

I think they're gonna be really good. Are the Lions on Crosby watch? ... I think them and maybe the Cowboys might be on Crosby watch. ... I think they probably will win the NFC North.

The 2026 NFC North winner will determine whether this prediction was correct.
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The Bears could have a top-five offense even if they miss the playoffs

There's a world where the Bears don't make the playoffs, but they're a top-five offense. And our defense is so bad that I can almost—I would be very upset, but I could deal with it.

This resolves when the 2026 regular season ends and Chicago's offensive ranking and playoff status are known.
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Big CatBig Cat

The Jaguars could win the AFC South

I think the Jaguars are not getting any respect or talked about a lot. I think they're gonna be really good this year. They could win the South. I think Trevor Lawrence is gonna keep going forward.

The Jaguars' season and Trevor Lawrence's 2026 performance will determine the prediction.