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Dave Portnoy will live to be 120 years old out of pure spite

Dave, everything will say Dave should die, and then he'll probably live to be like 120 because he's a motherfucker. ... He'll complain every single day for the rest of his life to 120, but he'll live to 120.

Dave Portnoy is still alive and thriving, though 120 is statistically unlikely.

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May 6, 2016
#27354
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

I like 'White Randy Moss' more than the football-playing Randy Moss

Not to be racist, but I like white Randy Moss more than black Randy Moss. ... I'm a bigger Randy Moss fan, the [broadcaster], than I am of the football playing Randy Moss.

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May 6, 2016
#10277
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I want to see a linebacker demolish the special needs kid during feel-good football plays

Does it make me a bad person that when that happens I always want some kid to just like truck stick them? ... I always want the opposing linebacker to just demolish the special needs kid and be like, no free plays on my field.

This is a subjective preference for chaos in feel-good moments.
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May 6, 2016
#10279
Big CatBig Cat

Always be wary of an 'offensive genius' coach

The offensive mind, always be wary of the offensive mind. That's actually a good motto in life. Mark Trestman's another one. Always be wary of the offensive genius. I'd rather a defensive guy than an offensive guy any day of the week.

The success of 'offensive geniuses' vs 'defensive guys' is a long-standing sports debate that varies by coach.

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Malik Nabers is a true No. 1 receiver

Malik Nabers is a bonafide, bonafide number one in the league, I think. I think Malik Nabers is a true number one.

Receiver ranking is inherently evaluative and cannot be definitively resolved.
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Big CatBig Cat

The Giants are a fun, good team

Even when they're good, they're not fun. This is a fun team. The Giants are fun. Good. Yeah. And I do think that they are a good team.

This is an evaluative opinion rather than a definitively verifiable claim.
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The Falcons can win the NFC South

Why can't they win the NFC South? Especially what we saw from the Panthers today.

The NFC South winner will determine whether this prediction comes true.