My cross-country road trip changed my life

It unlocked something in my brain that I don't think will ever go away. We just discover a lot about myself, which... [the road trip] saved, it changed my life.

Athletes only get into fights at 'nightclubs,' never at 'bars'

Have you ever noticed that when it's an athlete getting into a bar fight, it's always a nightclub. Yeah. And it's never like, they never just say like at a bar it's like at, at a local nightclub establishment.

Coach K is a hypocritical fraud for refusing halftime media interviews

Whoa. Are you, are you just realizing now that huge [hypocrite] fraud? Well, no. Jake is just realizing now because it's about halftime interview with the media. He never does halftime because he plays, plays on the roof. That's crazy. Like I understand he's a legend for whatever, but just take the interview.

The goal allowed by the US goalie was the most embarrassing possible

What about the goalie? Yeah, I mean he... that was the most embarrassing goal that I've ever seen. Possible.

The USMNT is the 'James Franklin Penn State' of soccer

People were making very mean jokes online that we were James Franklin, Penn State. And it is actually perfectly appropriate because if you look at who we played, we beat the teams we're supposed to beat... and then we absolutely got ass fucked by the team that was better than us in Belgium. We are not who we thought we were.

We just suck at soccer as a country and that's okay

My take is we suck at soccer and that's okay. Like, I don't care that we suck at soccer anymore. I'm going to root for the US team. I'm gonna get excited when we're in a World Cup. I'm gonna get hyped up and it's gonna be fun to watch. And then I'm gonna be reminded that we suck at soccer and that it's just gonna be like, okay, yeah, that's okay.