The Dodgers are a weaker team than the Nationals

The Dodgers are coming to Wrigley Field. I do think the Dodgers are a weaker of the two teams. Slash, I didn't want to see Daniel Murphy again.

I want the Cubs to keep winning just to keep Big Cat in a state of 'happiness edging' without winning the World Series

I want the Cubs to keep winning. I don't want the Cubs to win the World Series, but it's not because I want to see you in pain. I like it when you're this happy. I just want it to keep extending and extending. But I just don't want to see you ever reach that goal. You need to edge for about nine more months until spring training.

Mike McCoy is the most generic-looking white dude who probably goes to Jimmy Buffett concerts

Mike McCoy is the most generic-ass looking white dude. He's a guy that your dad plays golf with... McCoy just looks like a guy that spends too much time in the sun and has eight Salt Life shirts and goes to a Jimmy Buffett concert every fall, and that's his one vacation for the kids.

The intentional-grounding penalty was the right play

I actually think he had, that's an OC problem because there was no underneath route. If he throws that deep and, like, everyone had—it just was a shit show. He couldn't throw it deep because he was basically getting chased. If he takes a sack, everyone has to come back. It probably is more than 10 seconds to get the next play. So that one, I had no problem.

The Colts needed a complete reset after Chris Ballard's firing

Chris Ballard was there for 10 years, never won an AFC South. You finally just—it's inexcusable. The Andrew Luck retirement is probably what bought Chris Ballard a lot more years. He basically could just keep on saying, 'Well, our plans were screwed up because Andrew Luck retired.'

The NBA should start on Christmas Day and play 60 games

The NBA should start on Christmas day. It should be a 60-game schedule. It'd be so much better.