The Cavs-Warriors rubber match is the NBA Finals we need

It is the Cavs, Warriors, the finals everyone wants to see, the finals we need. It's the rubber match.

LeBron James' seven straight Finals appearances should have an asterisk because they were in the Eastern Conference

Asterisk, asterisk. They're all against the East. True. So let's not crown them just yet.

LeBron James threw Game 3 against the Celtics to help the Celtics' ticket sales

LeBron James threw Game 3 just so that all of Boston had to buy tickets for Game 5 so that he could buttfuck them in public.

The Cavaliers-Knicks series is over after Game 1

Series over, you can't lose that game if you're the Cavs. When it went into overtime, we said the Cavs have to win this. This is must win. You can't give this up. All time choke.

The Knicks are going to the NBA Finals

Memes, Zac, congratulations. Game one. I'm gonna say it. You guys are in the NBA finals. Congrats. I'm not even trolling.

Victor Wembanyama is the best watch in the NBA right now

[Wembanyama] is the best watch in the NBA right now. It's not even close... just his entire performance leaving it like, he was so gassed that three that looked like we were talking about it, it looked like it was almost like there was a whistle beforehand because it was like in slow motion. It was just incredible.