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Void
Oct 21, 2020·Hot Seat/Cool Throne
#25611
Big CatBig Cat

You should never jack off at a computer, ever

I think just a good rule of thumb is never jack off at a computer. Ever, ever, ever, ever. Just use your imagination or just put it to the side. ... No one's ever been busted jacking off to a Penthouse. Put it slightly to the side and you'll be set.

This is a subjective rule of thumb for avoiding professional ruin in the era of remote work.

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Win
Oct 21, 2020
#13403
Big CatBig Cat

The Dallas Cowboys are dead

The Dallas Cowboys are dead. D-E-A-D dead. Mike McCarthy... six weeks into the season and there's already a mutiny. He looks like he's given up. [The Cowboys] are ridiculously bad.

The Cowboys finished 6-10 and missed the playoffs in Mike McCarthy's first season.
Void
Oct 21, 2020
#25609
Big CatBig Cat

Dak Prescott sitting Indian style in the shotgun would be a better quarterback than Andy Dalton

Dak Prescott not moving would be better than Andy Dalton. ... [Or] Dak sitting down Indian style, like he's got a cramp, in the shotgun formation just on his ass. I think that Dak Prescott not moving would be better than Andy [Dalton].

The Cowboys offense struggled significantly under Dalton before he was sidelined with a concussion and then COVID-19, proving Big Cat's point about the massive drop-off from Dak.
Loss
Oct 21, 2020
#13404
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Every team in the NFC East should try to get Ryan Fitzpatrick

Any one of these... anyone in the NFC East should try to get Ryan Fitzpatrick. The reason is pretty simple. You can maybe win the division at 6-10. Seven and nine, you're a lock. And all you need to do is like hope that the Fitzmagic times up perfectly at the start of the playoffs.

No NFC East team traded for Fitzpatrick in 2020. The WFT did win the division at 7-9 as predicted, and they actually signed Fitzpatrick the following offseason.

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Void
May 15, 2026
#30496
Big CatBig Cat

The 2026 Thanksgiving Day schedule is the best single day of football ever

Wednesday night is the Packers versus the Rams. Then Thursday, Thanksgiving day is Bears, lions, Eagles, Cowboys, chiefs bills. That will be great. Like the day of Thanksgiving? Yeah. That's the best day of football I think maybe ever.

Whether it's the 'best day ever' is a matter of personal opinion and game quality.
Loss
May 15, 2026
#30498
Big CatBig Cat

The Colorado Avalanche will win the Stanley Cup

Congratulations to the Colorado Avalanche on winning the Stanley Cup. I'd like to say congratulations to the [Avs]. Pretty good bet to the [Avs]. Pretty good it's a pretty good bet if you, if you're a betting man, which I am. Congrats to the [Avs].

The Avalanche were eliminated in the second round by the Stars in 2026.
Void
May 15, 2026·Zoo Trades
#30500
Big CatBig Cat

Pittsburgh fleeced Boston in the gorilla trade

I think Boston got fleeced. Frankie got traded, 7-year-old. Frankie got traded to the Boston Zoo. He's going to just be chilling with a bunch of other dudes. Little Joe got traded to Pittsburgh because he's going to be mating and making new gorilla. Pittsburgh's the one that's gonna be making more gorillas. You guys are do everything all wrong. They're, they're making a gorilla factory in Pittsburgh.

Evaluating zoo conservation efforts through the lens of a sports trade is inherently comedic and subjective.