Jason Witten is clearly over his head and won't have a job at ESPN by the end of the year

I officially, officially feel bad for Jason Witten. He is so clearly over his head... And now I just feel bad because it feels like he's not going to have a job at the end of the year. And this is painful.

Trading for Demaryius Thomas makes the Texans a viable playoff contender

I think this actually makes the Texans a viable playoff contender. Well, okay. Three years ago. I want to caveat it by saying everything that I know about Demaryius Thomas, I stopped learning new things about him after the Super Bowl when they won.

Bill Belichick leaked the Josh Gordon suspension news to find a rat in the organization

Somebody was saying that Bill Belichick smells a rat inside his own nest. And he leaked that information to one person. And he was like, if this makes its way to Ian Rapoport's Twitter account, then I know that it's you, and it breaks my heart, but I know it was you.

The Patriots will three-peat by beating the Rams

Super Bowl threepeat: Patriots versus Rams. Patriots win again. ... By week 12, week 13, much to the chagrin of the world and especially this podcast, the Patriots will ... once again be a powerhouse.

Drake May will win MVP

I have Drake May as MVP.

The DMV is the worst line to wait in

DMV. Great pick. That's gotta be one one. Gotta be because it goes out of order too. Yeah. That bullshit. It is. Pick number sucks.