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HankHank

The Patriots will make the playoffs in 2026 while the Panthers will miss them

I think he's dead wrong [about the listener take]. I think it's gonna be two out of five in two outta five out. Chiefs and Lions in, 49ers and Panthers out. [The Patriots] are gonna make the playoffs. Yes.

Resolved at the end of the 2026 regular season.

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Aug 12, 2026
#31142
Big CatBig Cat

The Vikings have to trade JJ McCarthy now that he's lost the starting job to Kyler Murray

Kyler Murray has won the starting job in Minnesota for all the non-believers out there. It's a sad day. It's a bad day... you have to trade [JJ McCarthy], right? I guess so, but I don't know what you're gonna get... you drafted him two years ago and it's like, this was supposed to be the future and you're moving on from that already, so you just gotta rid yourself.

In this specific 2026 context, the outcome of a trade is pending.
Void
Aug 12, 2026
#31143
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Todd Monken's slip of the tongue confirms he believes Shedeur Sanders is better than Deshaun Watson.

The fact he denied it means that inside of his own head, he knows that. He would never say that because he doesn't believe it. If he had, if the guy was trying to trap him and he actually thought maybe, maybe Shedeur wasn't as good, he would just say like, 'you know, I don't remember ever saying anything like that.'... But the fact that he denied it tells me that in his own brain, he recognized that person's putting a lie on my name. Right. I have to correct the record. Oh shit, they got me.

This is subjective analysis of Monken's internal thoughts.
Void
Aug 12, 2026
#31144
Big CatBig Cat

Reporters who provide incorrect injury timelines should be forced to serve the length of that timeline in jail

I think it should be illegal and you should be in jail if you report that a player is injured for a short period of time and then it turns out they're injured for a longer period of time. Kobe Bryant is now out for four to six months because he got knee surgery. Everyone reported that he was out for eight to 10 weeks. That should be jail. Anyone who reported that should be in jail for eight to 10 weeks. You should have to serve the original sentence.

This is a satirical policy proposal that cannot be factually correct.

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HankHank

Drake Maye finally beat a playoff team

The knock on Drake Maye last year was he didn't beat playoff teams. They beat a playoff team today. Didn't convert on third and six. Had a huge third and six conversion today. So that's how I'm taking away: he can do both those things.

The Patriots beat Pittsburgh, which qualified as a playoff team in the prior season according to the discussion; the broader claim about Maye's ability remains a season-long evaluation.
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HankHank

The Commanders will roll over the Cowboys

I think the Commanders are gonna roll this game. The Eagles are good and the Commanders almost beat them. The Commanders are gonna beat the Cowboys.

The game between the Washington Commanders and the Dallas Cowboys was played on September 20, 2026. However, the final score and outcome of this specific game are not explicitly stated in the provided search results, making it impossible to determine if the Commanders won or 'rolled' the Cowboys.
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HankHank

The Bills are the AFC team to beat

Josh Allen's in his prime, they looked unbelievable. They're gonna be probably the team to beat in the AFC.

The Bills' 2026 season and AFC finish have not been resolved yet.