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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Being asked to be a Maid of Honor is a rough favor to fulfill

Will you be my maid of honor? Like that's such a – that is a rough ask. If you're a maid of honor, you've got to plan out the entire bachelor party. You've got to plan out the wedding shower. You've got to plan out... basic bitch t-shirts.

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Aug 1, 2016
#22596
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Cleveland is a downgrade for anyone living in Milwaukee

You can't just take a downgrade to Cleveland like that [from Milwaukee]. You've got to know if you're in Milwaukee, that's a city of champions.

Subjective opinion on which city is better.
Win
Aug 1, 2016
#14612
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Cleveland Indians won't win the World Series this year

The Indians, they're not going to win the World Series this year.

The Cleveland Indians actually made it to the 2016 World Series but lost in 7 games to the Chicago Cubs.
Win
Aug 1, 2016
#14613
Big CatBig Cat

The Cleveland Indians' name and logo will face massive media scrutiny now that the team is successful and in the spotlight

I have a prediction, though, because the [Indians] are now officially going for it with the Andrew Miller trade. We're going to get a lot of think pieces about the Indians logo. It's going to happen. The Indians are about to get [redskinned].

The Indians eventually faced significant pressure and officially changed their name to the Cleveland Guardians in 2021.

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Garrett Bolles should catch a pass before he retires

I want to be able to bet on Garrett Bolles to have one reception in every game. Because I feel like Sean Payton is going to try to get him that touch. He definitely will because he doesn't want him to retire as the guy who never touched the ball.

It requires Garrett Bolles to record a touch before the end of his career; that has not been resolved here.
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The Eagles' offense might be better without A.J. Brown

I actually think that the offense might be better without A.J. Brown.

Whether Philadelphia's offense performs better without A.J. Brown is a season-level comparative claim and is not reliably resolved here.
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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Chargers should eliminate their kicking game and go for it every time

The Chargers should just not have a punter. They should not have a kicker. They shouldn't even have like a long snapper on the team. Use those positions on somebody else and you're just—burn the boats. You're just going for it all the time. Fuck it. Who cares? Right? Season's over. Might as well try to score some points.

This is a deliberately satirical roster-building proposal, not a prediction that can be objectively graded.