The Home Run Derby has become way too complicated with clocks and Statcast data

The only reason I care about [the Home Run Derby rules] is because they took what was quite literally the simplest competition in sports, which is hit ball over fence... and then they put a clock in it. They added extra time based on a Statcast. They started measuring exit velocity. Timeouts should never be incorporated into the Home Run Derby. It's a very simple process.

Big Ben's year 18 diet is just a relatable attempt to outrun aging

I likened it to, after a long weekend of drinking and eating terrible food. And you say to yourself, you know what, I'm going to eat a salad on Monday. Everything will I'll maybe do 20 pushups. Wow. I'm back. That's what Big Ben is doing as a career where he spent 17 years eating PF Chang and doing whatever he wants. And then year 18. He's like, why is Tom Brady playing still? Oh, because he eats healthy. You know what, honey, get me a vegetable.

Coach K would never have lost two games in a row with Team USA

Coach K would never lose two games. He would absolutely never. You guys roast him day in and day out. He stops being the USA coach. They lose to Nigeria and Australia. Back-to-back coincidence or—

The Detroit Pistons are moving in the right direction despite their Game 7 loss

The progression of the Pistons along the way is like, what were they, two years ago? They won like 16 or 18 games. They were so bad. Last year they had competitive series against The Knicks. Then this year, the natural progression from that is, let's take the regular season super seriously. Let's win all the games that we can get a high seed... I would say the totality of this season, we're still going the right direction in Detroit.

I will renounce my American citizenship and become French if the Canadiens win the Stanley Cup

I will renounce American citizenship and become French if the Canadiens win the Stanley Cup this year... I'll probably need somebody to come and hang out with me and... the south of France is nice.

Patrick Reed is the first PAWG in the history of professional golf.

Patrick Reed, let me tell you, I think he might be the first PAWG golfer. He is. He's thick as hell. Like he was filling out. He also wears... the tight pants... he looks like early era Meghan Trainor... He bends over. He's like, ooh.