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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Gladiator fights to the death would draw huge ratings

If there were to be actual gladiator fights on television... I'd watch. I think it would draw huge ratings. Like, yeah, fight to the death. Someone's got to die. Someone's got to die... Someone's got to die within 10 minutes. Or else they both die.

While speculative, historical evidence from Roman times and the popularity of combat sports support the idea of high viewership.

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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Houston Texans might actually be better without J.J. Watt

And we're all have to wonder, are the Texans better without J.J. Watt?

The Texans finished 9-7 and won a playoff game without Watt in 2016, but statistically and historically, the team was always significantly better with the 3-time DPOY healthy.
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Nov 14, 2016
#10524
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The great uniter in America is watching Tony Romo look miserable

America can always get behind watching Tony Romo look miserable. That is the great uniter here in America. And we're used to seeing it after he throws a fourth quarter interception... This time it was when they were winning and he was trying to put on that happy face. And it turns out that Tony Romo putting on a happy face is actually the saddest thing you've ever seen.

This is a subjective opinion about public perception of Romo during his career.
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Nov 14, 2016
#10525
Big CatBig Cat

If Wisconsin wins out, they will lose to Alabama by 50 in the playoffs

This is a classic year where I start to tell myself, oh, maybe the Big Ten is really going to be back. And then one of those teams, probably Wisconsin, if they can win out, goes to Alabama, plays Alabama, and loses by like 50-7 or something like that.

Wisconsin did not make the 2016 College Football Playoff; they went to the Cotton Bowl and beat Western Michigan. Alabama lost in the championship to Clemson.

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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Garrett Bolles should catch a pass before he retires

I want to be able to bet on Garrett Bolles to have one reception in every game. Because I feel like Sean Payton is going to try to get him that touch. He definitely will because he doesn't want him to retire as the guy who never touched the ball.

It requires Garrett Bolles to record a touch before the end of his career; that has not been resolved here.
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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Eagles' offense might be better without A.J. Brown

I actually think that the offense might be better without A.J. Brown.

Whether Philadelphia's offense performs better without A.J. Brown is a season-level comparative claim and is not reliably resolved here.
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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Chargers should eliminate their kicking game and go for it every time

The Chargers should just not have a punter. They should not have a kicker. They shouldn't even have like a long snapper on the team. Use those positions on somebody else and you're just—burn the boats. You're just going for it all the time. Fuck it. Who cares? Right? Season's over. Might as well try to score some points.

This is a deliberately satirical roster-building proposal, not a prediction that can be objectively graded.