Pat McAfee 11/14/16

The Houston Texans might actually be better without J.J. Watt

And we're all have to wonder, are the Texans better without J.J. Watt?

The great uniter in America is watching Tony Romo look miserable

America can always get behind watching Tony Romo look miserable. That is the great uniter here in America. And we're used to seeing it after he throws a fourth quarter interception... This time it was when they were winning and he was trying to put on that happy face. And it turns out that Tony Romo putting on a happy face is actually the saddest thing you've ever seen.

If Wisconsin wins out, they will lose to Alabama by 50 in the playoffs

This is a classic year where I start to tell myself, oh, maybe the Big Ten is really going to be back. And then one of those teams, probably Wisconsin, if they can win out, goes to Alabama, plays Alabama, and loses by like 50-7 or something like that.

We need to bring back the BCS because computers don't have chaos

Computer's fault for ranking these teams too high. We need the BCS back. Is there a bug in the system? You know when there was never chaos? Russians are hacking the BCS system. Never had chaos. I know I agree. Forget that, let's bring it all back.

Home PAs should trick Russell Wilson by pretending to be the voice of God

Russell Wilson is the kind of guy that you could imagine a PA guy getting on the mic and going, 'Russell, this is God. I need you to throw an interception.' And Russell Wilson would at least consider that might be God... He thinks God talks to him. There are ways that you can exploit that.

Every NFL team that passed on Dak Prescott will be draft shamed forever

Dak Prescott has been named the starter. He was drafted 135... You could have had Dak Prescott. And people will remind you every single day... Everyone gets draft shamed now that Dak Prescott is officially the starter and a superstar.

I don't like Jay Feeley and think he's the worst

I don't like Jay Feeley. I don't like Jay Feeley... I hated him before he got on TV and sounded awful... [He] comes in and goes, 'tough kick here.' Okay, thanks, Jay. 'Yeah, looks like a little wind.' Yeah, way to go, Jay.

Andrew Luck apologizing to defenders is a mind game

He says, like, 'good hit.' I think it's a mind game. Keep him friendly. That's what I try to do... Try to keep on the good side. But Andrew's at that point where I need to do that. Andrew doesn't need to do that... Gotta be the only guy in the league that does it.

Chris Boswell's failed onside kick was an attempt to become a meme

They were doing it to become a meme instead of winning a football game. Bang. Maybe that's the thought. I don't know why you would do it. I don't know why else you would do it... I attempted it a couple of days in practice and thought I'd throw my ACL.

Gladiator fights to the death would draw huge ratings

If there were to be actual gladiator fights on television... I'd watch. I think it would draw huge ratings. Like, yeah, fight to the death. Someone's got to die. Someone's got to die... Someone's got to die within 10 minutes. Or else they both die.

Conor McGregor is the most electric athlete in all sports right now

Is Conor McGregor the most electric athlete in all sports right now? I think he is. I actually think he is. He's the one guy in the world where I have to watch everything he does... what Conor McGregor does is not only the fight, but it's after the fight. You have to watch what he says. He's unbelievable.

Magic Johnson is healthier than LeBron James because he conquered AIDS

I would make the case Magic Johnson might be a little bit more healthy [than LeBron]. Like the guys, he's conquered AIDS. 25 years. But I guess they didn't factor AIDS into this equation. But still.