I'm ready to care way too much about dumb sports shit and ignore serious topics

I'm so ready to not care about serious shit anymore. And just getting back to caring, like caring way, way too much about dumb shit. That's our right as Americans. It's our duty as Americans to do that.

Bryson DeChambeau is the number one baby back bitch in sports

[Bryson DeChambeau] is now the number one triple B in the sports world... I think he's baby back bitch of the year. The fact that he now has his caddy blocking camera guys too.

Brooks Koepka's recent struggles are due to his knees still hurting

I'm not going to make – [Brooks Koepka] would never say it, but I'm just going to say it for him. I think his knees still hurt. So that's probably why he hasn't been that great.

The Rams' Australia travel plan was an all-time 'fuck it' move

It was a terrible idea that Sean McVay tried to do, but I have to respect how much of an all-time fuck-it move it was to just pretend that time zones don't exist. He was just like, you know what, fuck it, we're not gonna adapt. We're gonna fly in, fly out.

KOC will get the best out of Kyler Murray

I think that what he's gonna get the absolute best outta Kyler Murray that he possibly can at this point, which I think should be good enough to be a pretty good team this year.

Jayden Daniels is going to remind everyone that the bad man is back

I think Jayden Daniels, he's as healthy as he has been since the start of last season. ... I think that he's gonna remind a lot of people who he is. Yeah. That's what I think. I think the bad man might be back.