Scottie Scheffler's Masters performance was legendary because it was so forgettable

What a legendary performance. We won't forget just because of it being so extremely forgettable. We'll always be like, you know what? This was the masters where Sunday was meaningless.

Every guy from Dallas looks like a 35-year-old accountant when they are only 25

He just reminds me of every dude I've ever met from the Dallas, Texas kind of area where it's like you're 25, but you look like you're 35 and you got married when you were 23 and you just got your shit together better. He looks like a medium good accountant that's pretty good at golf.

Cam Smith would be the coolest Masters winner because of the mullet and mustache combo

I really just have a soft spot for Australia... the mullet and the mustache combo. I'm pretty sure that like there's rules at Augusta National... if you show up wearing that, if it's, if you're not competing in a major tournament... they are allowed to shoot you. The security force at Augusta is allowed to put you down like a dog. He was, he was a fun guy to root for.

The 2026 World Cup final was boring and sucked.

It was boring ass soccer. It sucked. It made me thankful that the World Cup's over, that football's back. Now we can get back into real football, which I'm very, very thankful for. But that was actually, I think that was the best way to end the World Cup, because I'm totally fine with no more soccer now.

Fanatics Fest is a cynical place designed only to take money from fans.

It also seems like the most cynical place ever. Like, you can go to an autograph festival or a fan festival and you know that the guys are being paid to be there. And they're still like, happy to see, interact with you, all that shit. It just seems like every single thing about being at that place is just designed to take money from the people that are there.

Bryson DeChambeau is being targeted by selective rule enforcement.

I think that Bryson definitely did it and it's definitely against the rules. And he got caught for it and they enforced it against him because he's a bad boy. He's had some run-ins before. I don't think the R&A or whatever, I don't think they're particularly happy with Bryson right now.