Augusta National pipes in bird noises for the Masters broadcast

I'm more convinced than ever that the birds are actually piped in crowd noise. Agreed. There's one bird in particular. They play its call over and over and over. It's a cardinal, I think. They're getting sloppy with it. I think it might be a whippoorwill. But whatever it is, it's very obvious.

Bryson DeChambeau looks fat when he is playing poorly

When you're bigger and you're doing well, you're strong. And when you're doing poorly, you're fat. And he looks fat today. Not to body shame, but there's something about the plus four next to his name that the strength now becomes a little pudgy.

Brooks Koepka playing the Masters on one leg is the most heroic thing in sports history

Brooks is playing on basically one leg. It's probably the most heroic thing I've ever seen in any sport ever. This is like Willis Reed. This is Kirk Gibson. Everything that you can think of where someone just triumphs over all these injuries and hardships, that's Brooks shooting plus two today.

Garrett Bolles should catch a pass before he retires

I want to be able to bet on Garrett Bolles to have one reception in every game. Because I feel like Sean Payton is going to try to get him that touch. He definitely will because he doesn't want him to retire as the guy who never touched the ball.

The Eagles' offense might be better without A.J. Brown

I actually think that the offense might be better without A.J. Brown.

The Chargers should eliminate their kicking game and go for it every time

The Chargers should just not have a punter. They should not have a kicker. They shouldn't even have like a long snapper on the team. Use those positions on somebody else and you're just—burn the boats. You're just going for it all the time. Fuck it. Who cares? Right? Season's over. Might as well try to score some points.