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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

It is selfish to live past 100 years old

Once the clock strikes 100, at that point, you should just let go. You're being selfish if you live past 100. Yeah, you're kind of trying to show everyone up.

The value of human life is not capped at 100 years by any consensus moral or biological standard.

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Win
Oct 4, 2019
#11096
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Bill Belichick broke Sean McVay's brain and provided the blueprint for the rest of the NFL

I think the correct way to approach this narrative is, did Bill Belichick break Sean McVay's brain? The books, right now, there's a blueprint out there. This is Copycat League, okay? ... The defenses have caught up to Sean McVay's brain.

The Rams offense fell from 2nd in points in 2018 to 11th in 2019, and they missed the playoffs entirely that season, suggesting teams had indeed found ways to slow them down.
Void
Oct 4, 2019
#24370
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Troy Aikman is permanently concussed

He's concussed. He's concussed permanently. When he talks about Jared Goff, he calls him Jared Goff [Goff as in Golf]. I kind of like it. All the time.

This is a comedic insult and clinical diagnosis from a non-medical professional; it cannot be factually verified.
Push
Oct 4, 2019
#11109
Alex BregmanAlex Bregman

I'm staying off social media to avoid cause trouble and responding to chirps

I decided this year, you know what, I'm not going to cause that much trouble on social media. ... I won't be responding [to Trevor Bauer] anymore.

Bregman did mostly stay quiet until the scandal broke in November 2019, at which point he became the center of a massive social media storm regardless of his own posting habits.

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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Garrett Bolles should catch a pass before he retires

I want to be able to bet on Garrett Bolles to have one reception in every game. Because I feel like Sean Payton is going to try to get him that touch. He definitely will because he doesn't want him to retire as the guy who never touched the ball.

It requires Garrett Bolles to record a touch before the end of his career; that has not been resolved here.
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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Eagles' offense might be better without A.J. Brown

I actually think that the offense might be better without A.J. Brown.

Whether Philadelphia's offense performs better without A.J. Brown is a season-level comparative claim and is not reliably resolved here.
Void
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Chargers should eliminate their kicking game and go for it every time

The Chargers should just not have a punter. They should not have a kicker. They shouldn't even have like a long snapper on the team. Use those positions on somebody else and you're just—burn the boats. You're just going for it all the time. Fuck it. Who cares? Right? Season's over. Might as well try to score some points.

This is a deliberately satirical roster-building proposal, not a prediction that can be objectively graded.