The Browns defense will lead the league in swag this season

A stat that we'll have to keep our eye on this upcoming season. Jim Schwartz from the Browns said that their defense may not lead the league in points against, but they will lead it in swag. Okay. So we're gonna have to keep a running tally on whether or not the Browns are actually leading the league in swag.

Aaron Rodgers looks happier in New York than I've ever seen him

Aaron Rodgers looking as happy as I've ever seen him in his entire life. I'm so happy he's found a new home. The pre-game rundown of what Aaron Rodgers has been doing since his time in New York was hilarious. Yes. I don't know if you heard it, but they were like, he's been going to Broadway shows every week.

New Urban Meyer Jaguars stories will never run out

I hope we just never run out. Like every year it should just be, it's basically a time capsule. We should just open it up every year and be like, what's the new Urban Meyer anecdote from his less than one year in Jacksonville?

Garrett Bolles should catch a pass before he retires

I want to be able to bet on Garrett Bolles to have one reception in every game. Because I feel like Sean Payton is going to try to get him that touch. He definitely will because he doesn't want him to retire as the guy who never touched the ball.

The Eagles' offense might be better without A.J. Brown

I actually think that the offense might be better without A.J. Brown.

The Chargers should eliminate their kicking game and go for it every time

The Chargers should just not have a punter. They should not have a kicker. They shouldn't even have like a long snapper on the team. Use those positions on somebody else and you're just—burn the boats. You're just going for it all the time. Fuck it. Who cares? Right? Season's over. Might as well try to score some points.