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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Kids should preemptively tear their ACLs like a Tommy John procedure

If a running back was born without two knee ligaments, then they wouldn't have had their entire life to become over-reliant on their knee ligaments, and they'd actually be fine. So what I'm advocating is almost like a Tommy John type deal. It's an operation for the young kids. You preemptively tear both your ACLs, and so then that way they have more time to unlearn the bad habits that you get from playing on healthy knees before you become a pro.

Deliberately absurd medical advice satirizing the 'tough it out' mentality. Compares preemptive ACL tears to Tommy John surgery as a development tool.

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Oct 22, 2015·Monologue
#20472
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Pope should leave science to people who don't feel global warming

Lord, please tell the Pope that he needs to leave the science to all of us who don't feel the effects of global warming.

Satirical take on climate change deniers dismissing Pope Francis's climate encyclical Laudato Si (June 2015).
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Oct 22, 2015·Monologue
#20473
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Putting the Bill Simmons podcast on notice

I'm putting the Bill Simmons podcast on notice this week, baby. I'm coming for you, Bill. There's nothing you can do to stop me. It's a revolution.

PFT's solo Steam Room podcast never overtook Bill Simmons. However, six months later PFT co-created Pardon My Take which became one of the biggest sports podcasts ever.
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Oct 22, 2015·Monologue
#20474
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Dan Campbell might be the first interim head coach to win a Super Bowl

I personally think [Dan Campbell] might be the first interim head coach to win a Super Bowl.

Dan Campbell went 5-7 as interim coach in 2015 and did not reach or win the Super Bowl that season (the Broncos won).

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The Celtics are statistically a better team without Jaylen Brown

Jalen Brown has the second worst plus minus of any five time All Star over the past 10 years... Also the Celtics win more games without Jalen Brown than when he is playing... Last year with, with Jalen Brown, they won 66% of their games without, they won 80%... Their entire career with Jalen Brown. They are 263 and 1 31. That's 67% without Brown. There're 60 and 26, 70%.

The stats provided are fictional/hypothetical within the 2026 setting, but presented as fact to support a 'Ewing Theory' style take.
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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Celtics are no longer eligible to be the NBA's team of the 2020s without Jaylen Brown

If the Celtics rebuild and they get back to like the NBA finals, let's say in like 2029, let's say they win another chip in 2029, that's a different team. Like the core is completely different without Jalen Brown. I don't know that you could consider the Celtics to ever even be eligible for team of the 2020s. Because it's gonna be two different iterations of the team.

Inherently subjective criteria for what constitutes a 'team of the decade'.
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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

FIFA must change the rule so a red card does not result in a next-game suspension

I think it's just a, a terrible rule that if you get a red card from a game that you're also suspended for the next game. Yeah. You're already serving your punishment by, by sitting out the rest of that game and your team has to go down one player. Why do you have to sit out the next game?

This is a subjective opinion on sporting rules.