A-Rod is breaking up with J-Lo just for the clout

I feel like A-Rod is breaking up just for the clout these days.

Buying an NBA franchise is a better midlife crisis move than buying a sports car

What's tired: buying a sports car for your midlife crisis. Wired: buying a fucking NBA franchise.

If you don't listen to Coldplay, you're a loser

I'm going to say this right now. People bash Coldplay. I guarantee you. Like, if you don't listen to Coldplay, you're a loser.

The Detroit Pistons are moving in the right direction despite their Game 7 loss

The progression of the Pistons along the way is like, what were they, two years ago? They won like 16 or 18 games. They were so bad. Last year they had competitive series against The Knicks. Then this year, the natural progression from that is, let's take the regular season super seriously. Let's win all the games that we can get a high seed... I would say the totality of this season, we're still going the right direction in Detroit.

I will renounce my American citizenship and become French if the Canadiens win the Stanley Cup

I will renounce American citizenship and become French if the Canadiens win the Stanley Cup this year... I'll probably need somebody to come and hang out with me and... the south of France is nice.

Patrick Reed is the first PAWG in the history of professional golf.

Patrick Reed, let me tell you, I think he might be the first PAWG golfer. He is. He's thick as hell. Like he was filling out. He also wears... the tight pants... he looks like early era Meghan Trainor... He bends over. He's like, ooh.