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Void
Jan 11, 2021
#5251
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Mike Vrabel’s fourth-and-two punt against the Ravens was the most cowardly coaching move of the weekend

Mike Vrabel cut off his balls instead of his penis... It was honestly the most cowardly punt that I've seen... Bad weekend for Mikes in their punting. Bad, sad punt weekend.

Statistically, analytics heavily favored going for it; the Ravens scored on the ensuing drive to seal the game.

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Void
Jan 11, 2021
#5237
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Big Ben Roethlisberger will spend the entire offseason watching pornography

Sad Big Ben. He's going to watch so much porn this offseason.

This is a non-verifiable comedic claim.
Win
Jan 11, 2021
#5239
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Beating the Steelers was effectively the Super Bowl for the Cleveland Browns

These Browns just won the Super Bowl because I don't think anybody expects the Browns to go out next week and beat the Chiefs... this was the Super Bowl for the Browns, and they did it.

The Browns did lose to the Chiefs the following week, making this their final peak for the season.
Void
Jan 11, 2021
#22074
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The 2020 Pittsburgh Steelers were the worst 11-0 team in NFL history.

This does validate our take that the Steelers were the worst 11-0 team of all time. That was bad.

The 2020 Steelers are frequently cited by sports historians and data analysts as one of the least impressive 11-0 starts due to their late-season collapse and early playoff exit.

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Open
Nov 2, 2026
#31796
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Garrett Bolles should catch a pass before he retires

I want to be able to bet on Garrett Bolles to have one reception in every game. Because I feel like Sean Payton is going to try to get him that touch. He definitely will because he doesn't want him to retire as the guy who never touched the ball.

It requires Garrett Bolles to record a touch before the end of his career; that has not been resolved here.
Open
Nov 2, 2026
#31800
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Eagles' offense might be better without A.J. Brown

I actually think that the offense might be better without A.J. Brown.

Whether Philadelphia's offense performs better without A.J. Brown is a season-level comparative claim and is not reliably resolved here.
Void
Nov 2, 2026
#31802
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Chargers should eliminate their kicking game and go for it every time

The Chargers should just not have a punter. They should not have a kicker. They shouldn't even have like a long snapper on the team. Use those positions on somebody else and you're just—burn the boats. You're just going for it all the time. Fuck it. Who cares? Right? Season's over. Might as well try to score some points.

This is a deliberately satirical roster-building proposal, not a prediction that can be objectively graded.