Urban Meyer will eventually be the head coach at USC

We'll just call him future USC head coach Urban Meyer.

Urban Meyer will absolutely coach again despite his current retirement

He's going to coach again, right? He's absolutely going to coach again. He's going to coach again.

Brian Kelly is on the hot seat because Urban Meyer is now 'lurking' for the Notre Dame job

The hot seat, the loser of this, Brian Kelly. Now, I don't think that Urban Meyer is going to coach at Notre Dame, but you better believe that if next year Notre Dame doesn't play well the entire year, there will be a ton of Urban Meyer. He's just lurking. Basically, if you are a premier program now, you have Urban Meyer lurking over your shoulder.

The Bills could have three or four Super Bowls without kickers

You can make the argument that the Buffalo Bills would have like three or four Super Bowls if kickers weren't a thing in football. You can make the argument that the Patriots might not have had the start of that dynasty if it wasn't for kickers.

Jalen Hurts will answer the Titans by beating them as a passer

I actually think Jalen Hurts is good enough as a quarterback that when somebody dares him to do that, he could say, 'Fuck you, I will beat you as a quarterback.' And then stay in the pocket and throw for like 300 yards and three touchdowns.

The Jaguars would be the second-best team in football if they win in Denver

If they win this game in Denver, I would put them maybe second in the power rankings behind the Jets.