The Capitals made a massive mistake not re-signing Stanley Cup-winning coach Barry Trotz

The fact that the Capitals didn't re-sign their Stanley Cup winning coach after he won a Stanley Cup is still so fucking crazy to me. I know there's money and all that stuff, but how do you win a cup and not bring that guy back? ... He's a fun coach. He's a player's coach and once it gets to the playoffs, it's all about just making your team comfortable. Todd Reirden is not that guy.

This is the easiest sports letdown of all time because fans can't attend games or have parades anyway

This is the easiest letdown of all time because you can play that game in your mind like, 'What's the point of even winning a cup if you can't go to games or go to the bars with your friends?' ... If your team loses, just enjoy the fact that this will be the easiest letdown of all time that we will ever have as fans.

The Lakers are going to destroy the Blazers in five games

The Lakers are going to fuck the Blazers up. Put it up, put it right down, quote it. Five games. Maybe [four]. ... The Blazers play pickup basketball. They do not play defense. And they play against the Lakers. I think the Lakers just need to get three consecutive stops and the game's over.

Garrett Bolles should catch a pass before he retires

I want to be able to bet on Garrett Bolles to have one reception in every game. Because I feel like Sean Payton is going to try to get him that touch. He definitely will because he doesn't want him to retire as the guy who never touched the ball.

The Eagles' offense might be better without A.J. Brown

I actually think that the offense might be better without A.J. Brown.

The Chargers should eliminate their kicking game and go for it every time

The Chargers should just not have a punter. They should not have a kicker. They shouldn't even have like a long snapper on the team. Use those positions on somebody else and you're just—burn the boats. You're just going for it all the time. Fuck it. Who cares? Right? Season's over. Might as well try to score some points.