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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Buccaneers have hired Bruce Arians as head coach and Todd Bowles as defensive coordinator

I'm told that the Buccaneers have hired Bruce Arians as head coach and Todd Bowles as defense coordinator to be announced.

This was correct; the Bucs officially announced Arians on Jan 8, 2019, with Bowles as DC.

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Jan 7, 2019
#9453
Mike FlorioMike Florio

Jeff Fisher will not get another NFL head coaching job this year

Will [Jeff Fisher] get a job? No. ... If anybody is pursuing him, it is either being done very secretly or an owner is going to get to a spot where he says, you know what? I don't like any of these options. Let's go get Jeff Fisher. That's the only way it's going to happen this year.

Jeff Fisher did not get a head coaching job in 2019.
Loss
Jan 7, 2019
#29020
Big CatBig Cat

The Cleveland Browns are going to be good in 2019

I think that they are, we'll get to this later, but Browns, it's looking good for you guys next year. Really good.

The 2019 Browns were a major disappointment, finishing 6-10 despite high expectations.
Win
Jan 7, 2019
#29018
Big CatBig Cat

The Eagles' offensive line deserves more credit for keeping Khalil Mack and the Bears' pass rush clean

I will give credit, Nick Foles, the Eagles' offensive line was unbelievable. They basically kept Khalil Mack and the pass rush pretty much clean all night.

The Eagles' line allowed only one sack and limited pressure against a Bears defense that led the league in many categories, validating the take.

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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Garrett Bolles should catch a pass before he retires

I want to be able to bet on Garrett Bolles to have one reception in every game. Because I feel like Sean Payton is going to try to get him that touch. He definitely will because he doesn't want him to retire as the guy who never touched the ball.

It requires Garrett Bolles to record a touch before the end of his career; that has not been resolved here.
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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Eagles' offense might be better without A.J. Brown

I actually think that the offense might be better without A.J. Brown.

Whether Philadelphia's offense performs better without A.J. Brown is a season-level comparative claim and is not reliably resolved here.
Void
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Chargers should eliminate their kicking game and go for it every time

The Chargers should just not have a punter. They should not have a kicker. They shouldn't even have like a long snapper on the team. Use those positions on somebody else and you're just—burn the boats. You're just going for it all the time. Fuck it. Who cares? Right? Season's over. Might as well try to score some points.

This is a deliberately satirical roster-building proposal, not a prediction that can be objectively graded.