Going exactly .500 over a 15-year career like Eli Manning is actually very impressive

A remarkably average career outside of those two [Super Bowls]. If you can spend your entire career... he's been in the league for 15 years. If you can go exactly .500 after 15 years of playing football, that's super impressive. If you can keep any job and be perfectly average at it for that long, then you're doing something right.

Eli Manning is a Hall of Famer because Super Bowl wins carry the most weight

The Super Bowl carries so much weight that I am totally fine with Eli Manning definitely being in the Hall of Fame because of those two runs. And they were incredible runs.

Lorenzo Neal should be in the Pro Football Hall of Fame

Lorenzo Neal, eligible for the Hall of Fame. Go vote for Lorenzo Neal right now. It's been like 10, 15 years since we've had a real fullback get in. Lorenzo Neal should fucking be in the Hall of Fame.

I will never learn my lesson and will continue to believe in the Houston Cougars for the next four years

If you think this is going to deter me from believing in the Houston Cougars for the next four years, you are sadly mistaken. I will never learn my lesson when it comes to this team.

I'm glad I missed Peyton Manning's birthday because he has enough people sucking his dick

I'm glad I missed Peyton Manning's birthday by the way. Fuck, fuck that guy. He's got enough people to suck his dick and wish him a happy birthday. Awful announcing quote that. I hope I do it again next year.

Nate Oats would not be a great fit at UNC

I don't think he'd be a great fit there. Would people be talking about Nate Oats as much for this job if he didn't wear those jackets? They feel like Carolina jackets. It feels like he's been accepting people into anticipating him being the next UNC coach for a while.