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Void
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Using Delta 8 THC will make you better at video games

3Chi is great. It'll make you better at video games. There, I just said it... I get more kills as a single person in Warzone when I take a 3Chi than we do as a team when I'm playing with Billy.

Purely anecdotal and likely a comedic exaggeration; there is no scientific consensus that THC makes one better at fast-paced shooters.

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Void
Jan 13, 2021
#11768
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Nick Saban is the greatest coach to ever coach anything in any sport

Can we say in any sport, Nick Saban is the best coach to ever coach anything?

While subjective, Saban's 7 national titles (at the time) and dominance in the hardest era of CFB make this a valid, though debatable, stance.
Win
Jan 13, 2021
#11769
Big CatBig Cat

Nick Saban can truthfully guarantee every recruit a national title if they come to Alabama

If Nick Saban walked into your living room at any point in the last 14 years, he could say to you and your family, you will win a national title if you come to Alabama, and it is true. You can look at it, 09, 11, 12, 15, 17, 20... You are guaranteed to win a national title.

Historically accurate for Saban's Alabama tenure up to 2021.
Loss
Jan 13, 2021
#28874
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Nick Saban would eventually win a national title for West Virginia if he finished his career there

I think I would love to see Nick Saban at some point go finish his career at West Virginia. Just like maybe once he turns 75, get the end of the run for Saban, have him bring a couple titles to the Mountaineers.

Saban eventually retired from Alabama following the 2023 season and did not move to another program.

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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

Garrett Bolles should catch a pass before he retires

I want to be able to bet on Garrett Bolles to have one reception in every game. Because I feel like Sean Payton is going to try to get him that touch. He definitely will because he doesn't want him to retire as the guy who never touched the ball.

It requires Garrett Bolles to record a touch before the end of his career; that has not been resolved here.
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PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Eagles' offense might be better without A.J. Brown

I actually think that the offense might be better without A.J. Brown.

Whether Philadelphia's offense performs better without A.J. Brown is a season-level comparative claim and is not reliably resolved here.
Void
PFT CommenterPFT Commenter

The Chargers should eliminate their kicking game and go for it every time

The Chargers should just not have a punter. They should not have a kicker. They shouldn't even have like a long snapper on the team. Use those positions on somebody else and you're just—burn the boats. You're just going for it all the time. Fuck it. Who cares? Right? Season's over. Might as well try to score some points.

This is a deliberately satirical roster-building proposal, not a prediction that can be objectively graded.